Chapter 12 - Love Flashcards Preview

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Flashcards in Chapter 12 - Love Deck (56):

In the video where people rated the girl version of the face, how did they sexually rate themselves?

They were not attracted to themselves. So this is evolutionary thing so that we don't have sex that would product unhealthy offspring


How do women prefer different types of men when ovulating and not?

When ovulating choose more masculine, then when not ovulating a bit more feminine. This could also be more promiscuous behaviours.

This is from discovery channel video he showed us, and there's issues with the language used, such as masc and femme


What does my passionate score from test mean?

I got 91, which means I am Passionate

The results were:

Extremely Passionate
Extremely Cool


Do opposites attract?

NO! People who do not have the same interests, motivations etc are not attracted to each other.


How can mere exposure increase attraction?

So exactly what happened with Abady. Just hanging with him increased attraction the more I was exposed to him


How does propinquity influence attraction?

You'll most likely find someone who is in your "neighbourhood"


How does homophily influence attraction?

We usually actually marry within our status (equal status), instead of marrying a super rich guy etc. They get in relationships with people they perceive to be equal status


How does matching phenomenon influence attraction?

We are attracted to people who share our similar characteristics and traits


What is attraction-similarity hypothesis?

So it's basically purchasing power.

If you think you're a 10, you get a 10

If you think you're a 1 you get a 1

So can you just go out there, believe your a 10, and go get a 10. What do you bring to the table (job? money? muscle?)

But there is so more to attraction than physical attractiveness

Basically if we think the combined of our traits and everything make a 7, we will look for someone we perceive to be a 7 subconsciously


When you see a 10 get with the 1, what does that mean for the 10 according to attraction-similarity hypothesis?

That 10 actually perceives themselves to be a 1


What is the two-component theory of love?

What is the risk?

1. State of intense physiological arousal (butterflies) followed by:

2. Application of the label "love' to that sensation

Risk of Misattribution of arousal - which is physiological arousal from other stimuli attribute to feelings go love


The Triangular theory of love is going to be final exam. Describe it.

At top is liking (intimacy)

Bottom two is

Finish this off


What is love as a story?

A love story is a story about what love should be like. We're influence by ones from Disney with happily ever afters


When MRI of person who loves another person is looking at lover, what happens in brain?

Part of the brain responsible for dopamine lights up, the part that makes you crave something lights up.

You can have sex drive for someone and not be in love, and vice versa can never have sex with someone but still be in love.


Define Companionate Love

Feeling of deep attachment and commitment to a person with whom one has an intimate relationship


Define Documenting

This is when you give specific examples of the issue being discussed.


So when you censor or don't say things that you think might be deliberately hurtful to your partner or irrelevant, what is this called?



A communicator whose ____ matches his or her _____ is an effective communicator

Impact matches his/her intent


What is a set of rules designed to make arguments constructive rather than destructive?

Fighting Fair


What is the tendency to have contact with people who are equal in social status?



What is it called for someone elses understanding of what a speaker is saying?



What is intent during a discussion?

It is what the speaker actually means to communicate


Define intimacy

Quality of relationships characterized by commitment, feelings of closeness and trust, and self-disclosure


Define intimate experience

This is the meaning a person gives to their interaction with another person


What are the 5 characteristics of a intimate relationship

Relationship in which:
1. Intimate interactions occur on a regular and predictable basis

2. Relationship characterized by affection between partners

3. Mutual Trust

4. Partner cohesiveness

5. Self Disclosure


What is levelling with your partner?

This is telling your partner what you are feeling by stating your thoughts clearly, simply, and honestly


What is a love story?

This is a story about what love should be like, including characters, a plot, and a theme


What is the phenomenon when men and women have a tendency to choose partners that match them, who are similar in attitudes, intelligence, and attractiveness

Matching Phenomenon


What is the mere-exposure effect?

Tendency to like a person the more we're exposed to them repeatedly


What is making assumptions about what your partner thinks or feels?

Mind Reading


What is misattribution of arousal?

This is when a person in a stage of physiological arousal (such as from exercise or fright) attributes these feelings to love or attraction to the person present


What is the operational definition of something?

This is defining some concept or term by how it's measure. So we say IQ instead of intelligence level etc


What is paraphrasing?

Saying in your own words what you think your partner meant


What two characteristics make up passionate love?

1. State of intense longing for union

2. Intense physiological arousal


What is it called when you open up and tell person things about yourself?


Sexual self-disclosure is telling personal sexual things about yourself such as sexual likes and dislikes


What us Berscheids and Walster's theory for love that two conditions must exist simultaneously for passionate love to occur?

Two-component theory of love


What is it called when you tell your partner that given their POV you can see why he or she thinks a certain way?



How many Canadians couples share same educational background?

Over 50%


Research indicates what about women and mens worth in the dating marketplace?

Women are based on physical beauty whereas men are based on their success


According to Byrne's law of attraction, we tend to be attracted to what people?

People who give us many reinforcements and few punishments


Mind reading is what type of communication strategy?



According to attachment theory of love, what could be the problem of a failing relationship?

Mismatch of attachment styles


Do women fall in love more easily than men?



In collectivist culture like China, how do people select mates?

They emphasize group and societal goals in selecting mates


For most people whether straight, gay, etc, what two things are closely linked for love and attraction?

Emotional passion and sexual passion


According to triangular theory, there are what three components to love?

1. Intimacy

2. Passion

3. Decision or commitment

So these triangles need to match to be satisfied in relationship


The attachment theory of love says that there are what 4 types of lovers?

1. Secure lovers

2. Preoccupied lovers

3. Fearful lovers

4. Dismissing lovers


With a love story, when does falling in love happen?

When a person meets someone who can play a compatible role in his or her story


What could the neurochmeical component of love be?

1st, turning into 2 more

Produced by dopamine, and after this "high" can be replaced by companionate love with deep attachment and commitment. Which elevated levels of prolactin and oxytocin


What two neurochemicals may be produced by physical closeness and touch?

Prolactin and oxytocin


Who mad the scale to measure passionate love?

Hatfield and Sprecher


What are two basic components of romantic love?

1. Being in state of physiological arousal

2. Attaching label "love" to feeling


Whats the diff between individualistic cultures (Canada) with collectivist cultures such as China for love?

Independent stresses intimacy and love as basis for marriage

Collectivist emphasize intergroup bonds and discourage intimacy


What are the destructive patterns of interaction for unhappy couples?

1. criticism

2. Contempt

3. Defensiveness

4. Withdrawal


What is key for building relationship?

Key for maintaining?

Key to building a good relationship is reciprocal self-disclosure, and being a good communicator maintains a relationship


What are 12 tips for being a good communicator

1. Use "I" language

2. Avoid mind reading

3. document points with specific examples

4. Levelling and editing

5. Be non-defensive listener

6. Give feedback by paraphrasing

7. Be aware of non verbal messages

8. Validate the others POV

9. Draw your partner out

10. Engage in positive verbal and non verbal comm.

11. Fight fair when you do fight

12. Check out ambiguous sexy signals to find out what they really mean

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