YOU ROLLED A 6 Flashcards
actor A (19 cards)
Your attention please. Please do not leave personal belongings unattended. Any unattended items
will be confiscated and investigated. Fines may be applied.
Hey, how’s it going? Anyone
sitting here?
Now serving ZZ 793
What is with these weird, random numbers?
I feel like I’ve been here forever?
I know. This place feels like
Purgatory.
Purgatory ain’t got nothin’ on this place. It’s run by trolls and ogres that couldn’t give two shits about why you’re here or how long it takes you to get out. Just don’t fuck with their coffee breaks
All I have to do is get a new
driver’s license because my wallet was stolen.
Oh shit! Really? That sucks. What a waste of your time.
You’re telling me. I already had to turn around once because I forgot to bring enough ID information. Glad I realized it before I came in.
Now serving I 245
Thank God.
No! Fuck! Why did you have to say that? Gods have little to no power here, and invoking a deity only makes matters worse. Now you will have to use agility or some other bullshit to get out. Do you have high charisma? Turn on the charm, man. Kiss ass.
But you said the only thing they care about is their breaks.
Number D 245. How can I help you?
Yeah. I need to renew my license.
Ugh…
Um… will that be a problem?
Why would it be a problem? That’s what we do here, right? Do you need a new photo? Did you fill out the form? Did you recently invoke a minor deity in gratitude for shortening the amount of time you had to wait before being granted access to request an audience with the mighty Bruhahimen?
(May overlap) Yes. Yes. What?
Was there sarcasm in your invocation?
How did you even hear me?
I don’t answer questions. Did you make an offering?
To you? Are you asking for a bribe?
Of Course Not! Do not insult me! I am a gatekeeper of the light…which I highly doubt you will see before the end…
I’m sorry. Look. I think we got off to a bad start. Let me try again. Hello. I’m …
I DO NOT CARE. You have offended me and insulted Bruhahimen. Now you will have to vanquish Bailrock for your chance of an audience!
Wait. I have to do what now? I don’t have time for…
Vanquish! BAILROCK! Time!? (laughs) You Cannot move forward without defeating your greatest foe.
Balirook? Greatest foe!? I don’t even know who he is!
B-a-i-l-r-o-c-k is a what, not a he. It is the foundation of all of your fears and nightmares. Bailrock smolders in the pit of your soul feeding the fires of worry and dread from within. It starts as that tiny voice of doubt and festers. Like molten lava swirling at the heart of a volcano until the rising pressure in your miniscule life gives it strength enough to explode and overcome you. Smothering you. Showing you just how small you really are (triumphant laughter)
How… do I… vanquish… that?
Bailrock approaches. Roll
Do I know … it? It looks familiar…
Bailrock is known by all. Roll.
What do I have to do again?
Roll.
This is ridiculous (physically rolls across the floor)
