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Eternal Families > exam 4 > Flashcards

exam 4 Flashcards

1
Q

1.Elder Richard G. Scott said “one of the greatest blessings we can offer to the world is the power of a Christ-centered home” where what three things occur?

A
  • gospel is taught
  • covenants are kept
  • love abounds
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2
Q
  1. The Lord has counseled us to be “more diligent and concerned at home.” Elder Bednar offered three suggestions as to how we could do that. Name them.
A

1) Suggestion Number One: Express Love—and Show It
2) Suggestion Number Two: Bear Testimony—and Live It
3) Suggestion Number Three: Be Consistent

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3
Q
  1. What did Elder Hales say is the key to strengthening our families?
A

The key to strengthening our families is having the Spirit of the Lord come into our homes.

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4
Q
  1. When children test family values, it is important to apply the seven-word counsel given by Elder Hales. What was it?
A

Act with faith; don’t react with fear

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5
Q

5.President Eyring said if we want eternal life, it must be more than our hope. What must it be?

A

Our determination

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6
Q

6.President Eyring counseled us to plan for success, not failure. He said planning for failure can make failure more likely and the ideal less so. What specific counsel did he give to young women and young men to help them achieve the ideal?

A

Plan your life for the ideal, rather than planning on living it short of the ideal-dont plan for failure
learning to live off what they earn and doing what the family teaches us to do

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7
Q
  1. Name the four elements of the law of forgiveness.
A

First the lord commands us to repent of our sins and seek his forgiveness
second he commands us to forgive others
1) look for the good and not the bad in others
2) if we are guilty of saying or doing something that hurts or offends another we must take respoonsiblity apologize and do our best to make it right
3)to be forgiven we must be willing to forgive others
4)to be forgiven, we must forgive others from the heart.

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8
Q

8.Elder Holland said those who feel no need for mercy usually never do what two things?

A

They never seek it and almost never bestow it

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9
Q
  1. When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm to others, President Uchtdorf said we should apply a two- word counsel.What was it?
A

STOP IT

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10
Q

10.Trueor False: True forgiveness requires forgetting.

A

true

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11
Q
  1. What is the mission of the Church? Husbands and wives? Parents?
A

Church:to bring souls to Christ
Husbands and wives:to bring spouse to Christ-not obligation to make them change
Parents: bring children to Christ

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12
Q
  1. What does it mean to bring someone to Christ?
A

To help them feel his love and increase their desire to receive the blessings of His atonement through repentance

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13
Q
  1. Identify and describe four practices of happiness.
A

Practice 1: learn to minister-live as He lived
Practice 2: take the focus off yourself, look upward and turn outward-its not all about you!
Practice 3: express and show gratitude
Practice 4: identify, understand, and help meet the basic underlying needs of your partner

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14
Q
  1. Define ministering.
A

Service, to be a servant to others
To minister is to be genuinely interested in someone; to extend friendship, kindness, compassion, charity, and caring service. It is recognizing and attending to the needs of others. It is to “succor the weak lift up the hands which hang down and strengthen the feeble knees” doc and cov 81:5

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15
Q
  1. What is the divine motive?
A

Everything done is done with the intent to bring others to Christ so that they can be happy and reach their full potential. (goal with spouse isn’t to force them to do anything rather to help them come to Christ so that they make the necessary changes in life)

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16
Q
  1. Why did President Hinckley say so many people are miserable?
A

Those who are obsessed about themselves

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17
Q
  1. What question did President Eyring’s father suggest represents a true measure of what we love the most?
A

What do you love so much and think about most when you don’t have to think about anything else?

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18
Q
  1. What did President Benson suggest is the root of ingratitude?
A

Pride is a sin that can be readily seen in others but rarely admitted in ourselves.

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19
Q
  1. What did President Monson say is the finest formula for a happy marriage?
A

Think to thank

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20
Q
  1. Complete the following:
A

__humility_____________ precedes ____gratitude__________ and _____gratitude__________ precedes ___love and love precedes progress___________.

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21
Q
  1. What did both President Benson and President Kimball say is the root of most sin?
A

Deep unmet needs.

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22
Q
  1. Name and describe the seven basic underlying needs of human beings.
A

C-competence; achievement; good at something; successful (right now a lot of us have academic confidence, that might change into career or something else, help build spouses confidence)
R-reconciliation with God (cant do that for someone, is especially powerful and personal)
U-uncertainty/variety/spontaneity
C-certainty-assurances; know what to expect/depend on
I-independence; individual power; personal growth
A-acceptance; closeness; uniqueness; significance(example of two diff ways people are raised -rough day everyone rallies around and comforts them, other we all back up and give them space, can be hard when a couple consists of people from both bc they feel suffocated when they need space or abandoned when they need love- know when its important to be there and important to give you some space and personal time)
L-love; understanding; romance; sex

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23
Q
  1. In Ephesians 4, Paul warned against any type of corrupt communication because it grieves or drives the Spirit away. Specifically, he warned against bitterness, anger, backbiting and malice. In contrast, he said our communication should always be edifying. He then described three characteristics of edifying communication. What were they?
A
  • kind
  • tenderhearted
  • forgiving
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24
Q
  1. Speaking to the Hebrews, Paul noted two sacrifices we must be willing to make to please God. What were they?
A

to do good and to a communicate

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25
Q
  1. In his talk, “The Tongue of Angels,” what did Elder Holland specifically warn men about in their communication patterns?
A

Do not speak harshly, verbal abuse is a thing, don’t do it, you may never consider physically hurting your wife, but your words can certainly crush her heart if not careful.

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26
Q
  1. In his talk, “The Tongue of Angels,” what three things did Elder Holland specifically warn women about in their communication patterns?
A

Bridled tongue, no abrasive expression of any kind, including gossip or backbiting or catty remarks

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27
Q
  1. In his talk, “The Tongue of Angels,” Elder Holland counseled parents regarding two things they should do and two things they should not do. What were they?
A

Be constructive in your comments to a child—always
Praise each child individually for what that child is, and help him or her escape our culture’s obsession with comparing, competing, and never feeling we are “enough.”
Never tell them, even in whimsy, that they are fat or dumb or lazy or homely
And try not to compare your children, even if you think you are skillful at it.

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28
Q

6.Elder Holland quoted Orson F. Whitney. What did Elder Whitney say we are like when we have the Spirit of the Lord? What are we like when we don’t have the Spirit of the Lord?

A

optimistic with it; pessimistic without

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29
Q
  1. In class, we described three ways in which the Savior communicated. Name them.
A

Conclusion 1: He communicated with words and acts of love.
Conclusion 2: Jesus communicated with the Spirit
Conclusion 3: Jesus communicated from a good and pure heart, he was humble and meek and his words were edifying.

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30
Q
  1. Describe the six negative patterns of communication (from John Gottman), discussed in class, that arise from an impure heart.
A

1) criticism
2) defensiveness-counter attacks, blaming
3) contempt- disgust, making others feel stupid or inferior, sarcasm, name calling, eye rolling
4) stonewalling-avoiding or withdrawing from conflict and the relationship, silent treatment, research shows 85% of stonewallers in marriages are men
5) intimidation
6) manipulation-acting hurt (moping and pouting) to get sympathy and attention withholding or using physical affection to get something; manipulating through money or temporal things

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31
Q
  1. Complete the following:
A

Learn to __listen________ and __listen _______ to learn.

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32
Q
  1. Define validation.
A

Recognizing and accepting someones feelings and acknowledging them as important

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33
Q
  1. In class, we discussed sixways to validate feelings. Name them.
A

1) really listen
2) be present
3) summarize their feelings
4) put yourself in their shoes
5) reinforce the normalcy of their feelings
6) show genuine empathy

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34
Q
  1. Complete the following statement from Stephen R. Covey:
A

“Seek first to _______understand______________, then to be ___to be understood_________________.”

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35
Q
  1. In class, we discussed five reasons why conflict arises in relationships. Name them.
A

5 reasons: it is better to prepare and prevent than repair and repent
1. we are too quick to jump to conclusions (women eating cookies at airport example-turned out they weren’t her cookies)
2. we take offense to easily
3. we make personal oppinions more important than people in relationships. Thus we may win a battle and lose the war
4. Believe false doctrine that acceptable
5.

36
Q

2.True or False: Being offended is a choice we make, not a condition imposed upon us.

A

true

37
Q

3.True or False: Contention is inevitable in all relationships, including marriage and family relationships.

A

false

38
Q
  1. Complete the following statement from President Monson:
A

“Never let a _problem_____to be ____solved______ become more important than a __person________ to be __loved________.”

39
Q
  1. What is a mote? What is a beam?
A

mote=sliver, beam in your own eye

40
Q
  1. The first principle of conflict resolution discussed in class was to check your
A

______pride_______ at the door.

41
Q
  1. What is the higher ground principle?
A

Cant lift another person to another level that you arent already standing on

42
Q
  1. What are the two main reasons why people fail to follow the higher ground principle?
A

Pride and apathy

43
Q
  1. What did President Harold B. Lee say is the opposite of love?
A

Apathy

44
Q
  1. Experts say about _____ percent of all couple issues will resolve themselves if they are discussed and understood.
A

70%

45
Q
  1. Complete the following quote from B. H. Roberts:
A

“With ___principles________, let there be ___unity________; in _____preferences__________, let there be ____liberty__________; and in all things, let there be ___charity_____________.

46
Q
  1. What is the grapefruit syndrome?
A

Ceaseless pinpricking

47
Q
  1. Recently, AMCAP identified ___________ as the greatest source of conflict of couples entering marriage.
A

unrealistic expectations

48
Q
  1. What three things does the law of the harvest teach us?
A

You reap what you sow
You sow and reap in different seasons
Some harvests are more plentiful than others

49
Q
  1. Drawing from the Hebrew words for both “help” and “meet,” what did Elder Hafen say is the meaning of the word “helpmeet.”
A

Eve was Adam’s “help meet” (Genesis 2:18). The original Hebrew for meet means that Eve was adequate for, or equal to, Adam. She wasn’t his servant or his subordinate. And the Hebrew for help in “help meet” is ezer, a term meaning that Eve drew on heavenly powers when she supplied their marriage with the spiritual instincts uniquely available to women as a gender gift.3
Drawing on heavenly powers to be adeuquate

50
Q
  1. In Genesis 3:16, Eve was told that Adam would “rule over” her? How did Elder Hafen interpret the words “rule” and “over?” What word did President Kimball substitute for the word “rule?”
A

Rule-ruler-a measuring tool that sets standards, others can look to this person as a guide for how they should live
Over-rule over actually means to rule WITH, not exercise unrighteous dominion
preside rather than rule

51
Q

3.True or False: Spouses are not equal unless they perform the same functions.

A

False-dont perform the same functions in a family

52
Q
  1. Why, did Sheri Dewsay, God made men and women alike? Why did he make them different?
A

So that we could love each other, but enough different that we would need to unite our strengths and stewardships to create a whole.

53
Q
  1. To women, Sheri Dew suggested that no amount of time in front of a mirror will make you as attractive as
A

___having the Holy Ghost with you____.

54
Q
  1. To men, Sheri Dew said: “Your ordination to the priesthood is not a
A

_____a license to dominate_______, but is given you to ______of service__________.

55
Q
  1. In class, we discussed five principles that make equal partnership in marriage possible. Name them.
A 
Shared vision
Unity
Friendship
Trust
Spirit
56
Q
  1. The Proclamation teaches us that, by divine design, fathers are primarily responsible to do what three things in the home?
A

Preside, provide, protect

57
Q
  1. The Proclamation teaches us that, by divine design, mothers are primarily responsible for _
A

_nurture of their children____

58
Q

10.True or False: In the home, the husband acts as “president” and the wife acts as “vice-president.”

A

false

59
Q
  1. When couples are united, they share
A

___priorities____ which lead to common __goals_____.

60
Q

12.Trust= _

A

___character_____ + ___competence__

61
Q
  1. Name two important reasons why we need the Spirit to achieve equal partnership in marriage.
A

Shows us how to apply truth

Purifies and sanctifies our heart

62
Q
  1. In D&C 93, what did the Lord command parents to do? We keep that commandment by teaching them correct principles. What specifically did the Lord command parents to teach to their children in D&C 68.
A

teach them light and truth and the gospel (to understand the doctrine of repentance, faith in Christ, baptism and the gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of hands(gospel of Jesus Christ))

63
Q
  1. Parents should discipline their children according to principles of righteousness. According to D&C 121, what are some of those principles?
A

by cpersuasion, by dlong-suffering, by gentleness and meekness

64
Q
  1. Leadership of the family is a man’s most important and sacred responsibility. What twothings did President Hunter say effective family leadership requires?
A

quantity and quality time

65
Q
  1. Presiding in righteousness necessitates a shared responsibility between husband and wife. If a man operates independent of or without regard to the feelings and counsel of his wife in governing the family, of what did President Huntersay he is guilty?
A

exercising unrighteous dominion

66
Q
  1. In cases of divorce or separation, what did President Huntersay the Lord requires of the husband and father?
A

men must demonstrate that they are meeting family support payments mandated by law and obligated by the principles of the Church in order to qualify for the blessings of the Lord

67
Q
  1. As patriarch in the home, in what two ways did President Huntersay fathers should exercise their priesthood?
A

exercise your priesthood through performing the appropriate ordinances for your family and by giving blessings to your wife and children

68
Q
  1. What pernicious philosophy did Elder Christofferson say undermines women’s moral influence?
A

A pernicious philosophy that undermines women’s moral influence is the devaluation of marriage and of motherhood and homemaking as a career.

69
Q
  1. What was the third area of concern, mentioned by Elder Christofferson that threatens the moral influence of women?
A

A third area of concern comes from those who, in the name of equality, want to erase all differences between the masculine and the feminine. Often this takes the form of pushing women to adopt more masculine traits—be more aggressive, tough, and confrontational.

70
Q
  1. What or who did President Benson say is the “best teacher?”*
A

a good model/example

71
Q
  1. What three things did President Monson say we cannot afford to neglect?
A

Family prayer, family scripture study, and family home evening

72
Q
  1. President Hunter said true greatness is a long-term process that requires what?
A

Regular, consistent, small, and sometimes ordinary and mundane steps over a long period of time

73
Q
  1. Love should be the guiding principle in all discipline, the Lord said: “Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love.” What do the words betimes and sharpness mean? How can you know if you are being moved upon by the Holy Ghost to discipline?
A

Betimes-early on before its too late
Sharpness-with clairty and precision
Love is the motivating force

74
Q
  1. Section 83 teaches us about a husband’s financial responsibility to his wife or ex-wife and a father’s responsibility to his children. We are told that a wife has claim upon her husband until he is “taken.” What does that mean? Then, we are told that children have claim upon their parents for their maintenance until they (the children) are of “age.” What does that mean?
A

Husband should provide for the family unless he is unable, parents provide untilt he kids grow up

75
Q
  1. In section 104, the Lord said he created the heavens and the earth. Hence, what does he conclude? He goes on to say that His desire is to provide for His saints. What is His way of doing that?
A

The lord will take care of his saints, and give to needy if you have an abundance

76
Q
  1. In section 104, the Lord expresses His will that we should pay all our debts. He promises to help us if we do what three things?
A

Are diligent, humble, and exercise the prayer of faith

77
Q
  1. In class, we discussed four reasons why self-reliance is so important: Two from President Packer and two from the Handbook of Instructions. Name them.
A

President packer:
1) fundamental to happiness
2) if we lose our emotion and spiritual independence, we can lose the power of individual revelation (counselitis)
Handbook:
1) better prepared to endure adversities
2) better able to care for others

78
Q
  1. What did President Hinckley say is the root of more problems in marriage than all other causes combined?
A

money

79
Q
  1. True or False: Most problems with money occur because individuals and families don’t have enough money to make ends meet.
A

False-mismanagement of money

80
Q
  1. Name the five constants taught by President Tanner. (he recognized that they had what they needed and lived modestly even though he had plenty) if its a true principle, its true in any circumstance- the Lord seems to do his best work when the odds are stacked up against us
A

1) Pay an honest tithing
2) Live on less than you earn (two goals: avoiding debt and saving money each month) the key to living on less than we earn is discipline-Tanner
3) distinguish betweens needs and wants-wants are unlimited, make a list an dont purchase them for a good amount of time, if it’s still after that then consider it again as a want or need, work to get to the point that you both agree on wants and needs
4) develop and live within a budget
5) be honest

81
Q
  1. What was the first constant, and the one President Tanner said would have more to do with our financial well-being than any other?
A

Pay an honest tithing

82
Q
  1. President Hinckley said: “The Lord will open the windows of heaven according to our
A

_need__, and not according to our __greed__.

83
Q
  1. What two goals should we have in striving to live on less than we earn?
A

Goal 1: avoiding debts

Goal 2: saving money, put yourself first

84
Q
  1. What is the key to living on less than we earn?
A

Be content with what you have

85
Q
  1. In class, we discussed six prophetic counsels regarding career development. Name them.
A

1) get all the education you can
2) excel
3) seek work you enjoy
4) seek work that you look forward to
5) develop christlike attributes
6) work hard
7) do more than is expected
8) work even when you don’t feel well

Eternal Families (4 decks)

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