Magic Words

Question 1

Because

Answer 1

Using “because” increases persuasiveness by 50%

Question 2

List the six magic word categories discussed in this book

Answer 2

six types of magic words: words that (1) activate identity and agency, (2) convey confidence, (3) ask the right questions, (4) leverage concreteness, (5) employ emotion, and (6) harness similarity (and difference).

Question 3

What is one way to harness activating and identifying words?

Answer 3

Turn a verb into a noun. Example: Instead of asking someone to help, ask them to be a helper. Increases chance of success by 30%

Question 4

How do category labels establish identity?

Answer 4

Category labels often imply a degree of permanence or stability. Rather than noting what someone did or does, feels or felt, category labels hint at a deeper essence: Who someone is. Regardless of time or situation, this is the type of person they are. That they will always be that way.

Question 5

Other than changing verbs to nouns, list four more ways to harness identity and agency.

Answer 5

Four more ways to harness it are to: (1) change can’ts to don’ts, (2) turn shoulds into coulds, (3) talk to yourself, and (4) know when to use “you.”

Question 6

Why is don’t better than can’t

Answer 6

Can’t implies you might want to but are being stopped by an external explanation. For example, “l can’t eat cake because my doctor told me to lose weight.” Don’t implies an internalized, final decision.

Question 7

When could you use can’t instead of don’t?

Answer 7

When you want to get out of something by shifting the blame.

Question 8

What is advantageous about using could instead of should?

Answer 8

Could has no moral boundaries but should has implied moral dimensions that limit options.

Question 9

How can you improve your outcome by altering the way you talk to yourself?

Answer 9

Instead of saying,”I’m going to screw this up” say,”Bill, you’ve done this before and you will do fine.” Added 3rd person perspective forces you to take a step back from the situation.

Question 10

Should you use “you” in a customer service scenario?

Answer 10

No. Use passive voice to avoid the perception that the customer is at fault

Question 11

Should you use “you” in a social media post?

Answer 11

Yes, it attract attention in a positive way

Question 12

List the four ways to speak with confidence?

Answer 12

Four ways to speak with confidence are to: (1) ditch the hedges, (2) don’t hesitate, (3) turn pasts into presents, and (4) know when to express doubt.

Question 13

Explain hedging and how to avoid using it to appear more confident.

Answer 13

Hedging expresses uncertainty. Uncertainty doesn’t inspire confidence. Avoid or minimize hedging to be more impactful.

Question 14

How does hesitation affect impression of confidence?

Answer 14

More hesitation is viewed as less confident

Question 15

Why does verb tense matter for conveying value?

Answer 15

If you say, “The beach was fun.”, it implies that maybe it’s not still fun, but if you say,”the beach is fun” there is no question.

Question 16

How does question asking influence perception of competence?

Answer 16

Usually increases perception of competence

Question 17

List four strategies for asking better questions

Answer 17

Four strategies for asking better questions are to: (1) follow up, (2) deflect difficulties, (3) avoid making assumptions, and (4) start safe, then build.

Question 18

Why do follow up questions work to foster engagement?

Answer 18

Follow-ups work because they signal responsiveness. Rather than just being polite or asking questions to change the subject, follow-up questions demonstrate that someone listened, understood, and wants to know more.

Question 19

What is the key to asking a good deflecting question?

Answer 19

The key is asking a related question that shows interest. Signaling that we are seeking relevant information rather than hiding it.

Question 20

List three ways to harness the power of linguistic concreteness.

Answer 20

Make people feel heard. Want to show someone you’re listening? Give specific details that show we paid attention and understood.

Be concrete. Don’t just pick things that sound good, use words that listeners can see in their minds. It’s a lot easier to imagine a red sportscar than ideation.

Focus on the How. Thinking about the nuts and bolts of how something will happen, and focusing on specific actions, makes things concrete.

Question 21

What approach should you use if your goal is to come off as powerful, or make something seem like it has growth potential,

Answer 21

Use abstract language.

Focus on the why. Thinking about the reasoning behind something helps things stay high level and communicate that big picture.

Question 22

What is one way to leverage emotion in communication (hint: HtH)

Answer 22

Highlight the hurdles. As long as we’re already seen as competent, revealing past shortcomings can make people like us more, not less.

Question 23

What is a second way to use emotion in communicating. Hint:BaRC)

Answer 23

Build a roller coaster. The best stories blend highs and lows. So to increase engagement, know when to go negative. Talking about all the failures along the way makes the successes evermore sweet.

Question 24

What’s a third way to use emotion to improve communication? Hint: MuM

Answer 24

Mix up moments. The same intuition applies to moments as well. Smooth rides are easy, but not the most engaging, so to hold people’s attention, mix it up a bit.

Question 25

What’s a fourth way to use emotion to improve communication? Hint: CtC

Answer 25

Consider the context. When trying to persuade, it’s not just enough to say something positive. Emotional language can help in hedonic domains like movies and vacations, but backfire in more utilitarian domains like job applications or software.

Question 26

What’s a fifth way to use emotion to improve communication? Hint: CtS

Answer 26

Connect, then solve. Solving problems requires understanding people. So rather than jumping into solutions, connect with the person first. Starting with warmer, more emotional language helps set things up for the more cognitive, problem-solving discussions that come later.

Question 27

What’s a sixth way to use emotion to improve communication? Hint: AU

Answer 27

Activate uncertainty. The right words can make any topic or presentation more captivating. Evoking uncertain emotions (e.g., surprise) will keep people engaged.

Question 28

When and why similarity is useful for communication?

Answer 28

Signal similarity. When familiarity is useful or fitting in is the goal, similar language can help. Paying more attention to how our colleagues are using words, for example, and adopting some of their mannerisms should help us thrive at the office.

Question 29

When Andy why is using similarity not useful for communication?

Answer 29

Drive difference. But similarity isn’t always good; there are also benefits to differentiation, particularly if you’re doing a job in which creativity, innovation, or stimulation is valued, standing out might be better.

Question 30

How does changing the plot progression affect communication?

Answer 30

Plot the right progression. Further, when drafting presentations, writing stories, or crafting certain types of content, think about the progression of ideas. Start slowly to make sure the audience is on board before speeding up to increase excitement, particularly when entertainment is the goal. But if your goal is to inform, slowing down but covering more ground is the better way to go.