A JOKE A DAY 1

Question 1

What did the punching bag say to the boxer?

Answer 1

Hit me baby, one more time.

Question 2

Why did God supposedly make men before He made women?

Answer 2

Because everyone needs a rough draft.

Question 3

What can you catch but not throw?

Answer 3

Your breath.

Question 4

Why is the obtuse angle sad?

Answer 4

Because it’s never right.

Question 5

Why did Adele cross the road?

Answer 5

To say “hello from the other side”.

Question 6

What do a coder and a plant have in common?

Answer 6

STEM

Question 7

What should you do when no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?

Answer 7

Keep going until you get a reaction.

Question 8

Why shouldn’t you worry about passing math?

Answer 8

Because it’s easy as pi.

Question 9

A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here.”

Answer 9

Hahaha

Question 10

How do Minecraft players celebrate?

Answer 10

With block parties!

Question 11

Why did the picture go to prison?

Answer 11

Because it was framed.

Question 12

Why can’t you keep pimples in prison?

Answer 12

Because they keep breaking out.

Question 13

Why do all judges get As in English class?

Answer 13

Because they know all about sentences.

Question 14

What did Harry Potter do when he went bald?

Answer 14

Got a Hedwig!

Question 15

What do you call a rash on a pig?

Answer 15

Hogwarts

Question 16

I tried writing with a broken pencil, but it was pointless.

Answer 16

Hahaha!

Question 17

What do you call a cow without a GPS?

Answer 17

Udderly lost.

Question 18

What are the most popular perfumes for ages 12 to 18?

Answer 18

Adolescents.

Question 19

What do you call an old snowman?

Answer 19

A puddle.

Question 20

What do you call a pooch in heat?

Answer 20

Hot dog

Question 21

Why do pirates have to learn the alphabet?

Answer 21

If they don’t, they’ll be lost at C.

Question 22

What did the baby corn say to the mom corn?

Answer 22

Where’s popcorn?

Question 23

Did you hear about the kidnapping on the bus?

Answer 23

It’s okay. He woke up.

Question 24

Can February March?

Answer 24

No, but April May.

Question 25

What kind of music do balloons hate?

Answer 25

POP

Question 26

How do you drown a hipster?

Answer 26

In the mainstream.

Question 27

What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

Answer 27

A stick.

Question 28

What does a cloud wear under his raincoat?

Answer 28

Thunderwear.

Question 29

What time is it when the clock strikes 13?

Answer 29

Time to get a new clock.

Question 30

What did one toilet say to the other?

Answer 30

You look a bit flushed.

Question 31

What do you think of that new diner on the moon?

Answer 31

Food was good, but there really wasn't much atmosphere.

Question 32

Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?

Answer 32

Because she wanted to go to high school.

Question 33

What do you call a dog magician?

Answer 33

A labracadabrador.

Question 34

How do you get a squirrel to like you?

Answer 34

Act like a nut.

Question 35

What do you call two birds in love?

Answer 35

Tweethearts.

Question 36

How does a scientist freshen her breath?

Answer 36

With experi-mints.

Question 37

How are false teeth like starst?

Answer 37

They come out at night.

Question 38

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Answer 38

Finding half a worm.

Question 39

What is computer's favourite snack?

Answer 39

Computer chips.

Question 40

How do we know that the ocean is friendly?

Answer 40

It waves.

Question 41

What is a tornado's favourite game to play?

Answer 41

Twister.

Question 42

How does the moon cut his hair?

Answer 42

Eclipse it.

Question 43

How do you talk to a giant?

Answer 43

Use big words.

Question 44

What animal is always at a baseball game?

Answer 44

A bat.

Question 45

What falls in winter but never gets hurt?

Answer 45

Snow

Question 46

Why did the kid cross the playground?

Answer 46

To get to the other slide.

Question 47

Why was the baby strawberry crying?

Answer 47

Because her mom and dad were in a jam.

Question 48

How do you make a lemon drop?

Answer 48

Just let it fall.

Question 49

What did the limestone say to the geologist?

Answer 49

Don't take me for granite.

Question 50

What kind of tree fits in your hand?

Answer 50

A palm tree.

Question 51

What has ears but cannot hear?

Answer 51

A cornfield

Question 52

What did the left eye say to the right eye?

Answer 52

Between us, something smells.

Question 53

What did one plate say to the other plate?

Answer 53

Dinner is on me.

Question 54

Why did the student eat her homework.

Answer 54

Because the teacher told her it was a piece of cake.

Question 55

When you look for something, why is it always in the last place you look?

Answer 55

Because when you find it, you stop looking.

Question 56

Why was the equal sign so humble?

Answer 56

Because he wasn't greater than or less than anyone else.

Question 57

How do you stay warm in any room?

Answer 57

Go to the corner - it's always 90 degrees.

Question 58

Why was the fraction nervous about marrying the decimal?

Answer 58

Because he would have to convert.