CBT Flashcards
(27 cards)
6 Rumination Techniques
1) Notice and name “I am runinating”
2) Limit - postpone to a later le scheduled time
3) attention shifting - the present moment, people & senses, action-oriented is best!
4) abstract o concrete - focus on 1-2 small things you can do NOW!!
5) overthinking to values - what do I want more of?
4)
Types of rumination.
Ruminating about the past
Over analyzing decisions
Working about the future
Social anxiety
Bad thinking habbits / distortions
1) jumping to negative conclusiongs - instead let’s assume positive intent
2) overgeneralizing - something happens 1 time and we think it’ll happy many times for forever
3) black and white thinking - thinking everything is absolute, fixed
4) over emphasizing the negative - instead explicitly call out the positives!! FOCUS HERE
5) using feelings to gauge what is so / truth - and then justifying. feelings are transient, biochem., etc. Need to base whatt is real and truth on other things than emotion
ALL have this in common - WE HAVE CREATED MEANING FROM THIN AIR - From what’s so today.
From that we’ve created an entire story.
“instead I’ve got an exciting challenge in front of me!” this is exactly what I need to succeed!
Thoughts = Results!
Thoughts > Beliefs > Actions > Results
WE ARE IN DIRECT CONTROL OF OUR THOUGHTS!
We have direct control over what thoughts we create.
questions to ask:
1) have other people like me done what I want? - answer will always be yes!
2) have others before me had same positive or negative beliefs. yes they can adopt positive!
3) what did I just make that mean? (what is the story we just told ourselves about doing something?) e.g. PE networking “they won’t respond” - instead “they are looking for people exactly like me!”
Most immportant belief!
I CAN CHOSE WHO I WANT TO BE AND CHANGE MY BEHAVIOR IN EACH MOMENT!
I AM A MASTER OF BEHAVIOR CHANGE AND LEARNING
MESSAGING ORDER
ALWAYS START WITH THE POSITIVE FRAME AND THEN MOVE TO EMPATHY AND ANY LESS THAN POSITIVE NEWS
Bad tends to stick and people remember it.
Work on saying influencing only the positive and making it accessible!
MOST IMPORTANT DAILY EXERCISE
2 STATEMENTS OF GRATTITUDE!
Reframing habit
Bad story >
ID as Silly =, made up, bad story! >
Tell a positive story instead! Make up 5-6 other stories!
Also make up 1 positive, silly, and ridiculous story to drive the point!
Say these are all just made up stories!
Mental hack - by thinking of many other stories we’ll convince ourselves that all of these stories are made-up, subjective, and allow ourselves to disconnect and put less weight in each.
Story checks:
1) is my story truthful?
2) is my story kind? - Reminder - I value trusting others and giving others the benefit of the doubt!
3) does my story allow for actions
When feeling stuck in a situation?
1) take a break
2) do some activity that makes you feel calm and open - walk, guitar, walk, tv, meditation
3) WRITE about the problem
4) call someone - and talk through, as long as they push back on you when needed and don’t always agree
I have a growth mindset
and ask how can i learn from this?
how can i get better?
what if everyone is a robot only sent here to test my resilience & reactions?!
Befrendinf my inner critic!
1) assume good intention - he’s trying to help me!
2) figure out it’s goal - where is he trying to get me?
3)
e.g. “you’re lazy”
1) thanks for caring at me!
2) you must wish for me to be productive! your goal is to motivate me to act and I want to be motivated too
3) what can i do? I need to have balance, health, exercise etc. realistic etc. how can we figure out what to do and collaborate together?!
How to stop feeling failure!
Recognize: If you feel failure
1) not aggressiveley pursuing goals! Lack of goals and indecision about things is a sign of fearing failure
2) obsesssed with being perfect. Way to avoid something
3) procrasinate or create other means of sabotaging yourself. Convenient excuses on lack of progress
How to overcome it:
1) broaden how i define failure. Maybe a partial success is great and not a failure! E.g. 10 ppl show up at party and not 30. Expand how you measure success! DESIRE MORE OUTCOMES
2) realize failure isn’t always about you. There are circumstances outside of control that efffect pursuits
3) don’t focus on other people’s endpoints! Don’t compare.
4) imagine the worst that could happen and prepare for it.
5) appreciate the value of failing. Bad teaches you a lot. Evaluate situation and correct course!
Then move forward and pivot
Improve Charisma and BL
GOAL - Let people leave my presence feeilng good about myself!
Charisma
1) smile when you talk - emotions are contagious
2) be curious and interested in others. small talk with private people - neutral topics, events, space, etc.
3) Encourage and support others. People crave support and admiration! People love those who are open and nonjudgemental
Body Language: convey important, open, interested, interesting
1) Fill the space around you. Keep shoulders relaxed. Sit tall and relaxed
2) Lean toward the person you are speaking with and keep consistent eye contact
3) Don’t fidget. Be STILL
4) SLOW DOWN. Walk slow back up striaght and glide
5) Mirror - Can mimic someone’s movements gently. Posture manerrisms. ALLOW A DELAY. FEW SECONDS. JUST SOME.
Chronic Fight, Flight Freeze…
When in this state constantly:
1) label and notice
2) grounding - Calm response. Practice these… EVERY DAY
Bottoms up body > brain
- Label senses - Breath, Touch, Etc.
- Breath:
0-10 anxiety scale before and after
Ask what am I noticing before and after?
Ps grounding exercise
Parasympathetic Nervous System: Calming part of NS. Want PS dominant NS
1) pay attention to present moment deep breath and let out slowly
2) senses touch.3 items around me and touch them
3) see 3 things and desc. in mind
4) hearing 3 sounds and desc. in my mind
Straightening the back grounding exercise
Remind ourselves we are strong and calm.
1) collapse chest and back. notice feelings and mood. say i am powerful, i am happy’
2) lengthen spine. extend head higher. not feelings and breathing. say i am sad with head up high
Note to cary in upright posture!
grounding creating a safe space
1) feet on ground quickly scan body for tension. squeez and relax where helpful. end in heart and on breath
2) think of time place confident, safe, calm! MUCH DETAIL. Thanksiving dinner in MD!!
- what do i see around me? smell? who’s there? what else do i notice? Remain here for 30 seconds and open eyes
Visualize memories thoughts and visions of my safe places!!
grounding: breath counting
exhale count. up to 5. and start back at 1
repeat this 5 times
square breathing
breath is connected to what we can and cannot control! symp and parasymp
train our brain to convert something stressful into something helpful!!
Do 4 breaths of square breathing. exhale all out when you can.
over time can lengthen to 10-16 seconds breatth hold
perceived danger vs. safety!
antidote to perceived danger is PERCEIVED SAFETY!
Visualization and grounding does this :)
grounding: softening the gaze
vegal nerve > calm down>
Notice things in your perifery! notice what’s on the edges. keep looking ahead
Pelvic floor relaxation
Bear down act like you’re pooping
Tighten it up!
Then relax it
Abba and whole pelvic area!
Vegal tone
1) long deep intentional breathing LONG exhale
2) mono tasking slowly each day
Vegus nerve goes both ways brain <> body.
calm body <> calm mind
chestt breathing only 70% oxegenated
hands on stomach > lean back in chair > move hands when breath
self regulation tehniques in the situation of stress!!
