Lecture 9: Attraction, love and communication

Question 1

Attraction

Answer 1

Immediate and positive emotional and/or behavioural response to someone

Question 2

Physical Attractiveness

Answer 2

• When given a choice, the hotter the better
• Heterosexual men tend to value it more than women
• symmetry
• Body size/proportions
• facial attractiveness

Question 3

The four horsemen of the apocalypse (Gottman)

Answer 3

1. criticism
2. contempt
3. defensiveness
4. stonewailling

Question 4

communication

Answer 4

• important for romantic relationships, sex included
• poorer communication at the start of a relationship linked to relationship problems (break up) later on

Question 5

Predictors of Long-Term Relationship Satisfaction

Answer 5

• Feeling loved/appreciated
• Emotional closeness
• Sexual satisfaction (quantity, type, context, etc.)
• Self-disclosure
• Ability to resolve conflict
• Skilled communication (relationship/sex)
• Mindfulness (being present, identifying and communicating emotions)

Question 6

Arranged vs. love marriages

Question 7

romantic beliefs

Answer 7

• notion of ‘one true love’
• 73% of Americans believe in soul mate
• romantic beliefs associated with greater risks of relationships collapse

Question 8

Love as a story (sternberg): what love should be/is like

Answer 8

Contains characters, a plot, and a theme

Some examples of love stories:
- War Story – constant fighting, two warriors
- Love is a Mystery – ambiguous, mysterious, a partner that you can never really know
- House and Home – home is the centre of the relationship
- Garden Story – love needs constant work/tending

Question 9

Intimacy + decision/commitment

Answer 9

companionate love

Question 10

intimacy + passion

Answer 10

romantic love

Question 11

passion + decision/commitment

Answer 11

fatuous love

Question 12

intimacy + passion + decision/commitment

Answer 12

consummate love

Question 13

Sternberg’s triangular theory of love

Answer 13

intimacy - emotional component
passion - physical attracttion
decision/commitment - short term = I love you / long term = marriage

Question 14

reciprocal liking

Answer 14

• We like those who like us and we dislike those who dislike us
• speed dating study (Luo & Zhang, 2009)

Question 15

Matching phenomenon

Answer 15

• We tend to choose partners who match us in quality
• self-esteem plays a role

Question 16

opposite attract

Answer 16

false

Question 17

Assortative Mating

Answer 17

The tendency to choose a partner who is similar to oneself on one or more characteristics

Question 18

Homophily

Answer 18

Tendency to have contact with people equal in social status

Question 19

Ethnicity

Answer 19

The most consistent similarity for
people in relationships

Question 20

Mere exposure effect

Answer 20

Greater attraction the more exposure we have to them

Question 21

Key predictors of partner choice:

Answer 21

• Proximity
• Mere exposure
• Homophily
• Similarity
• Matching phenomenon
• Reciprocal liking

Question 22

What causes certain characteristics to be considered attractive?

Answer 22

biology and culture

Question 23

Sexual selection

Answer 23

Evolution of adaptive traits to increase reproductive advantage

Question 24

Parental Investment Theory

Answer 24

Women have greater minimal obligatory investment when having children

Question 25

Sexual strategies theory

Answer 25

• Men and women face different adaptive problems in reproduction
• As a result, they evolved in different ways to overcome these problems

Men - which women can reproduce
women - more choosy, men that are committed