H2A: Myths in the Way of interpersonal effectiveness Flashcards

1
Q

What are some myths that get in the way of objectives of interpersonal effectiveness?

A

myths that get in the way of objectives of interpersonal effectiveness include:

  1. I don’t deserve to get what I want or need.
  2. ‰‰If I make a request, this will show that I am a very weak person.
  3. ‰‰I have to know whether a person is going to say yes before I make a request.
  4. ‰‰If I ask for something or say no, I can’t stand it if someone gets upset with me.
  5. ‰‰If they say no, it will kill me.
  6. ‰‰Making requests is a really pushy (bad, self-centered, selfish, etc.) thing to do.
  7. ‰‰Saying no to a request is always a selfish thing to do.
  8. ‰‰I should be willing to sacrifice my own needs for others.
  9. ‰‰I must be really inadequate if I can’t fix this myself.
  10. ‰‰Obviously, the problem is just in my head. If I would just think differently I wouldn’t have to bother everybody else.
  11. ‰‰If I don’t have what I want or need, it doesn’t make any difference; I don’t care really.
  12. ‰‰Skillfulness is a sign of weakness.
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2
Q

What are some myths that get in the way of relationship and self-respect effectiveness?

A

Myths that get in the way of relationship and self-respect effectiveness include:

  1. I shouldn’t have to ask (say no); they should know what I want (and do it).
  2. They should have known that their behavior would hurt my feelings; I shouldn’t have to tell
  3. them.
  4. I shouldn’t have to negotiate or work at getting what I want.
  5. Other people should be willing to do more for my needs.
  6. Other people should like, approve of, and support me.
  7. They don’t deserve my being skillful or treating them well.
  8. Getting what I want when I want it is most important.
  9. I shouldn’t be fair, kind, courteous, or respectful if others are not so toward me.
  10. Revenge will feel so good; it will be worth any negative consequences.
  11. Only wimps have values.
  12. Everybody lies.
  13. Getting what I want is more important than how I get it; the ends really do justify the means.
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