Act 1 Flashcards
Reeny
I’ve had a terrible chest the past few weeks, he’ll tell y’.
John
You haven’t been well at all, have y’, Mum?
Betty
(going over to give Ted a cigarette)That’s right – I had the varicose veins and you had the piles. Remember, Reen? Are you comfortable enough there, John?
John
Yes, thanks, Aunty Betty.
Betty
Are you sure?
John
Yes, thanks.
Vera
It’s just like a cloud y’ know, Reen.
John
(testing his seat)I think you’ve hit the nail on the head there Aunty Vee. It is just like a cloud.
Reeny
(quietly)It’s certainly nice, Betty.
John
It is just like sitting on a cloud isn’t it, Mum?
Betty
Ah. We just finished the last bottle yesterday, Reen. I’ll tell you what you’d like – why don’t you have a drop of whisky. And some beer for John, eh John?
John
Please Aunty Bett!
Reeny
And don’t you go drinking it all at once.
John
I won’t, Mum.
Reeny
He doesn’t want to be goin’ out. Do y’ John?
John
There’s nowhere to go, Aunty Vee.
Ted
It’s looked after, Vera. Our John’ll tell y’, how often do we clean that car, John?
John
Four times a week we clean the car.
Ted
An’ that’s in summer.
John
In winter we clean it five times a week.
Reeny
Sometimes more than that isn’t it, Ted?
John
You probably don’t know this, Aunty Vera, but the car has been likened to the human body!
Vera
I bet I could think of one couldn’t you, Reeny? (She shrieks with laughter but her attempt to lighten the topic of conversation is ill-timed and fruitless.)
John
Did you know that me dad had worked it out, Aunty Vera? At home we’ve got this chart that he made showing all the links between man and the car. Haven’t we, Dad?
Ted
Tell him, John.
John
Barbarians!
Ted
Oh – I watch them all. See, with the documentaries – the whole – of human life – is there! We can learn from things like that, y’ see. Now last night – she – (Indicating Reeny.)– wouldn’t watch it – but I did, didn’t I, John?
John
You watched that documentary, didn’t y’, Dad?
Ted
Tell him, John.
John
University Challenge.
