Ch. 11: Attraction and Love Flashcards
(25 cards)
Mere Exposure Effect
repeated exposure to a person makes you like them more
AKA: the “girl next door” effect
Homophily
the tendency to have contact with people of similar social status
(ex: Education)
The Matching Phenomenon
we choose a romantic partner who is similar to us in areas such as attitudes, intelligence & attractiveness
How does physical appearance affect attractiveness?
1) most ppl are attracted to good-looking people (even preschoolers)
2) your physical attractiveness correlates with your partners physical attractiveness
Attractiveness is mostly about ___
first impressions (especially in hookup culture)
how successful is online dating? (how many ppl end up married)
among online daters, 44% end up married
Byrne’s Law of Attraction
we like people who give us lots of reinforcements & few punishments (so spend a lot of time together)
Evolutionary theory: Sexual Strategies Theory (Buss)
physical attractiveness is a guide to fertility
men= attracted to young women b/c more fertile
women= attracted to healthy men & men willing to contribute resources to them & their kids
intimacy
commitment, closeness (emotional & cognitive), trust, self-disclosure
how does self-disclosure look like?
- telling personal things about yourself
- promote a sense of intimacy
- promote reciprocation
how can intimacy be measured?
how many times x person listens to me when I need someone to talk to
love
doing something to make partner happy
Sternberg’s Triangular Theory
3 components to love:
1-intimacy: emotional component
2-passion: motivation or drive component (physical attraction, drive for sexual expression)
3-decision/commitment: cognitive component
long-term: moving in together
short-term: realizing that I love you
3 types of lovers in Attachment Theory
3 types of lovers:
secure= closeness is easy, natural for them (53% of adults)
avoidant= closeness is difficult for them (26%)
anxious-ambivalent= insecure, desperately want closeness, but then pull away from partner (20%)
Cause of Attachment Theory
- result of childhood experiences of attachment
- secure attachment at 12 months predicts more positive relationships at ages 20-23 (rated by self and partner)
Love Styles
John Alan Lee proposes 3 basic types:
Eros- love based on powerful physical attraction
Ludus- love is play, not serious commitment
Storge- love that builds slowly & is very stable, lasts through crisis
2-component theory
love involves 2 components:
1) physiological arousal
2) cognitive label (love)
misattribution of arousal
arousal is not love
ex: the scary bridge study which showed that ppl misattribute arousal in event processing to love & attraction (trauma bond?)
passionate love
intense, all-consuming, lasts 6-30 months
companionate love
deep attachment & commitment following the passionate phase
biochemicals involved in passionate love
dopamine–> euphoria
biochemicals involved in companionate love
oxytocin–> calm pleasure
individualistic cultures show…
priority is on the individual’s goals, over group goals or societal goals
collectivistic cultures show…
priority is on group & collective goals over personal
- the self is defined by the group
- arranged marriages for the good of the families
