CH.11 attraction

Question 1

What leads to friendship and attraction?

Answer 1

• need for affirmation and belonging
• motivation to bond w others in relationships that provide ongoing, positive interaction
• proximity

Question 2

proximity

Answer 2

• geographical/physical closeness
• enables interaction
• allows for anticipatory interactions (when you anticipate positive interactions => actual positive interactions => liking)
• creates familiarity => liking

Question 3

advantages and disadvantages of internet relationships

Answer 3

• can connect w ppl you aren’t physically close to (psychological closeness)
• become integrated into lives in the same way face to face relationships do
• less breadth and depth than traditional relationships
• high emotional loneliness
• lacks nuances of real time connection

Question 4

matching phenomenon

Answer 4

• ppl are likely to form relationships with someone equally attractive

Question 5

physical attractiveness stereotype

Answer 5

• people who are viewed as physically attractive possess other socially desirable traits as well
• physical attractiveness most affects first impressions
• hot ppl aren’t actually v. different from others in basic personality traits

Question 6

matching phenomenon

Answer 6

• tendency for men and women to choose partners who are a “good match” in attractiveness and other traits

Question 7

matching phenomenon exceptions

Answer 7

• ex: Donald and Melania
• people offer something that compensates for attractiveness
• men commonly offer wealth/status
• women commonly offer youth/attractiveness

Question 8

What is attractive?

Answer 8

• average is found most attractive
• beauty signals health, youth, and fertility

Question 9

What is attractive?

Answer 9

• average is found most attractive
• beauty signals health, youth, and fertility

Question 10

social comparison

Answer 10

• comparing ourselves to people we find beautiful
• influences our evaluations of strangers, partners, and ourselves

Question 11

contrast effect

Answer 11

• women exposed to beautiful (VS models) ppl will rate themselves lower in attractiveness than women who didn’t see anyone beforehand.
• same happens for men, but stronger for women

Question 12

similarity and attraction

Answer 12

• we like people who are similar to us (not rlly opposites attract– not supported by research)
• dissimilarity breeds dislike

Question 13

Role of attributions

Answer 13

• we must perceive that ppl who like us are being sincere
• ingratiation: use of strategies (like flattery) to gain someone’s favor– won’t be fond if we think they’re doing this

Question 14

reward theory of attraction

Answer 14

• we like those whose behavior is rewarding to us or whom we associate with rewarding events

Question 15

relationship rewards

Answer 15

• influences on attraction: proximity, attractiveness, similarities, mutual liking

Question 16

passionate love

Answer 16

• a state of intense longing for union with another; being “in love”
• absorbed in each other, feel ecstatic at attaining partner’s love
• expressed physically
• lust and attachment
• most cultures have romantic love, more important in individualistic cultures
• men fall in love more quickly, out of love more slowly

Question 17

compassionate love

Answer 17

• passionate love fades— compassionate occurs after
• affection we feel for those w whom our lives are deeply intertwined

Question 18

secure attachment

Answer 18

• 7 in 10 babies
• rooted in trust and marked by intimacy
• in more stable, long-term relationships and friendships as they grow up
• greater commitment, satisfaction, trust
• secure–secure is the ideal pairing

Question 19

avoidant attachment

Answer 19

• 2 in 10 babies
• caregiver rejecting of child, child learns to inhibit stress “fend for themselves”
• often uncomfortable with emotional intimacy, view others as untrustworthy

Question 20

anxious attachment

Answer 20

• 1 in 10 babies
• super inconsistent caregiver, child never sure if parent will be there with them
• priority on intimacy in romantic relationships, trouble establishing it to the desired level (clingy then indifferent or hostile)
• anxious woman, avoidant male is the worst pairing!

Question 21

equity principle

Answer 21

• outcomes ppl receive from a relationship are proportional to their contribution
• perception of equity is important to relationship satisfaction

Question 22

self-disclosure

Answer 22

• revealing intimate aspects of oneself to others
• disclosure reciprocity

Question 23

divorce across cultures

Answer 23

• individualistic cultures higher divorce rates (more importance in individual satisfaction/personal fulfillment/passion)
• lower divorce rates in collectivist cultures (less importance on individual factors)
• 78% of US women vs 29% Japanese women think “keeping romance alive” is important

Question 24

divorce in the US

Answer 24

• hard to measure rates across states
• rates ^ for those over 35
• declined/stabilized for younger cultures

Question 25

Factors that decrease rates of divorce

Answer 25

- married after 20y/o - both from stable, two-parent families - dated for a long time before marriage - well and similarly educated - enjoy stable income - live in a small town/on a farm - do not cohabitate or have a child before marriage (debated!) - religiously committed - similar age and faith