Chapter 1 "Choose What and If" Flashcards
No amount or preparation can save a conversation if the person who brings up the failed promise isn’t …?
in the right frame of mind.
When approaching accountability discussions who must we work on first?
Ourselves
Before saying anything what must you ask yourself?
What and If
The WHAT question is?
WHAT violation or violations should be actually addressed?
The IF question is?
You have to decide IF you’re going to say anything?
What may be the most important concept of this book ?
The question of WHAT you should discuss.
What are some signs that you are dealing with the wrong problem?
- Your solution doesn’t get you what you really want
- You’re constantly discussing the same issue
- You’re getting increasingly upset
If the solution you are applying doesn’t get you the results you really want, its likely you’re dealing with?
the wrong problem.
Living the same problem over and over, day after day, is referred to as?
Groundhog Day
The ability to reduce an infraction to its bare essence takes?
Patience, Proportion, and Precision
To make sure you are “Confronting the Right Issue” you must….
1 - Take time to unbundle the problem
2 - Must decide what is bothering you the MOST
3 - You must be concise
The issue should be distilled to a?
Single Sentence describing the problem
The acronym CPR stands for?
Content
Pattern
Relationships
What has just happened? refers to the ______ of CPR.
“C”ontent
What has been happening over time? refers to the _____ of CPR?
“P”attern
What is happening to us? refers the the ______ of CPR?
“R”elationship
Of the 3 concerns of CPR, which is the biggest concern?
“R”elationship
What helps you determine what is the most important issue to discuss?
Analyzing Consequences
What 2 factors should be considered when determining CPR issues that routinely pop-up in accountability discussions?
Consequences and Intentions
What 3 essential aspects should you think about when picking out the possible infraction when there are many on the list?
- What do I want for myself
- What do I want for the other person
- What do I want for the relationship
To Decide what Issue to Confront use the following:
- Think CPR (Content, Pattern, Relationship)
- Expand the list by considering “Consequences” and “Intentions”
- Choose from the list using what you do and do not want for: yourself, other, and relationships
Once you have unbundled the issue you must ask yourself?
IF you are going to say something.
It is sometime better to consider ________ before deciding whether to bring up the issue.
Consequences
When it comes to not speaking when you should what is the prominent issue?
Going to silence