Comm 10 Midterm Flashcards

Question

Mass communication.

Answer 1

Mass communication involves a large group where individuals are too numerous to know by sight.

Answer 2

Something comes in between source and receiver (physical and inanimate), typically removing them from face to face

Answer 3

Text messages - physical / inanimate thing coming between you and your friend is your phone (mediated interpersonal communication)

Answer 4

Weekly study group for Comm 10 communicating through a groupchat, or even an old-fashioned conference call (all in different places and talking at the same time)

Answer 5

Lecture speaking in person to students with a microphone (physical inanimate object) or visiting someone at jail (talking through the plexiglass and phone but seeing each other face to face)

Answer 6

Live face to face

Answer 7

E.g., Diary (writing into the diary and re-reading), giving yourself a reminder on your phone

Answer 8

Public communication - One source does most of the talking, might not know the person - Some feedback - When non-mediated, audience feels as if there are norms to follow (e.g., raising hand to speak)

Answer 9

Newspaper, books, paintings (this could also be any of the four types, debatable) - Even more impersonal - Can give feedback - Less norms to follow (e.g., how you act when you are watching the TV)

Answer 10

1. Intrapersonal 2. Interpersonal 3. Small group 4. Mass

Answer 11

Interpersonal to mass communication E.g., Open your phone to read a restaurant review (mass communication) and the go to call your friend (interpersonal) - Blog - interpersonal communication --> extend access to friends --> publish publicly for millions of people

Answer 12

= Complex process by which people receive, select, organize and interpret their sensory stimulations into a meaningful coherent picture "Put yourself in my shoes, you are driving me crazy, look at it my way" - We can talk to each other sometimes but communication can be misunderstood (largely out of having different perceptions)

Answer 13

Presidential campaign ad of the President talking to US veterans - perceived that he cares about veterans vs manipulating the US public to get votes

Answer 14

With our 5 senses of hear, touch, taste, smell, speak

Answer 15

1. Reception = relatively automatic and mechanical process through the functioning of our senses, 2. Analysis = more active, involve focusing, organising and interpreting

Answer 16

The eye takes in 5 million pieces of stimuli but the brain can only deal with 500 at any one time --> everyone selects the 500 pieces differently

Answer 17

1. Obvious, easy to see (e.g., seeing a hot guy at a bar and sitting in his line of sight to make it easy for him to select her) 2. Intense = to exist in a high or extreme degree (e.g., walking down the street and hearing vehicular noises and ambulance blaring, will select to hear the ambulance) 3. Contrasts = stands out because it is different (e.g., someone wearing a Hawaiian shirt in the lecture room vs regular college student clothing, packaged products are meant to stand out bc they're different from each other) 4. Repetition (similar to the idea behind commercial slogans like Nike's Just Do It!)

Answer 18

1. Past learning experiences 2. Culture 3. Language 4. Motivation 5. Stereotypes 6. Roles 7. Mood 8. Attitudes 9. Psychological tendencies

Answer 19

Past learning experiences = when we're acting out in the world, we have certain experiences and we learn certain things these experiences influence our perception (e.g., a woman who had several relationships with men who were manipulative and then found out each man was manipulative so she thought all men were like that → is more aware now)

Answer 20

Culture (e.g., a study showed people two pictures at the same time and asked what they saw - bullfighter vs baseball player. In Mexico, most people saw bullfighters vs in the US, most people saw basketball players)

Answer 21

Language - Sapir-Wharf hypothesis = language determines the way you perceive the world (e.g., people in the North perceive a different snowy world in comparison to the US. In the North, they have many different words for "snow", in comparison to the one in the US) and (e.g., bilingual people studies have shown that speaking in different language affects perception - in Hong Kong, when students spoke in Cantonese vs English, they were more traditional in values, reflecting the culture of the language)

Answer 22

The cause is what you see and culture and then language. Just because there is not another word does not mean you cannot perceive it.

Answer 23

Motivation = perception within ourselves (e.g., buying a specific model of a car and now seeing so many of it on the street)

Answer 24

Stereotypes = generalizations that we make, particularly generalizations about people, sets of beliefs about the personal attributes about members of a particular groups. They lead you to selectively perceive members of those groups in a certain way, influence the information you retain when interacting with group, influence the inferences you make. Its part of the normal process of classifying and categorizing reality; oftentimes they are filled with errors, exaggerations, half truths. Get stereotypes from the mass media. Not necessarily negative, but even positive stereotypes tend to have a negative twist (e.g., dumb jocks, admiring doctors but also being on call 24/7) --> places yourself above that group

Answer 25

Roles = social positions that we occupy and carry out the roles, roles influence social perception (e.g., occupational roles - teacher in a classroom, viewing the subject matter as straightforward and important vs student viewing it as confusing and boring)

Answer 26

People put on different moods and shown pictures (e.g., A study shows a picture oc hildren playing in a swampy setting to groups of different moods. The happy mood expressed their joy in seeing the children enjoying the outdoors and playing outside. People in a grumpy mood described it as gross and how they should do a different activity. People who were anxious asked where the adults were, worrying that someone would get hurt)

Answer 27

Attitudes = values, thoughts and feelings that we have (e.g., sporting events - referee never gives your team a fair share - predisposed prejudice), (e.g., after Presidential debates, media typically try to find undecided voters to decide who won as the others are too biased and there is no point)

Answer 28

1. Selective exposure = only expose ourselves to messages that we agree with and ignore those that don't (e.g., Athiest would not join a Christian Bible Study) 2. Selective attention = tend to pay attention to parts of the message that we agree with, resonates with our beliefs, attitudes and values (e.g., governor Gavin Newson giving a speech ab the environment and economy, you agree with environment policies but not the economy, so when he talks about the environment you pay attention and if he says stuff about the economy you don't agree with then you tune him out) 3. Selective retention = the tendency to be able to recall information that is supportive of your beliefs more readily than those countered against (e.g., governor Gavin Newsom's speech - you will retain what he spoke about on the environment because they were supportive of your beliefs)

Answer 29

System composed of words

Answer 30

Any use of symbols used for communication

Answer 31

1. Stand for / refer to things in the world (reference) 2. We can perform actions with words 3. Evoke emotions 4. Reduce uncertainty 5. Express complexities 6. Promote human contact

Answer 32

- E.g., Different words for "dogs" in different languages - E.g., Chinese characters drawing out makes sense (relationship between the symbol and what it stands for, like mountain and 山)

Answer 33

1. Bypassing 2. Abstractions 3. Euphemism 4. Relative language 5. Static evaluation 6. Language limited vs unlimited reality 7. Subcultural differences on the uses of language

Answer 34

Bypassing = using the same words with different meanings / different words mean the same thing (e.g., thong being a type of underwear but meaning slippers in Australia) Equivocation = refers to the fact that many words have more than one commonly accepted definition (two or more meanings) → you're not sure which definition they mean (e.g., a friend shows you a painting she just finished you could reply equivocally and wow that's unusual i've never seen anything like it rather than one meaning that's ugly)

Answer 35

Abstractions = generalizations we make about similarities between / among objects, people, events, at times used to prevent people from knowing more (e.g., me and my friend rather than situationship), e.g., someone finds out you are taking comm 10 and they ask where are you learning it and you say yes i'm learning it in a classroom, yes in a school, yes in a lecture hall

Answer 36

Euphemism = pleasant term substituted for a blunt one, softening the impact of information that is unpleasant, can obscure the accuracy of your message (e.g., "passed away" for died, "landfill" instead of dump). Dysphemism is a blunt term, opposite of euphemism. E.g., Euphemism for abortion = women's reproductive rights vs dysphemism for abortion = killing babies. Euphemism make life seem agreeable and pleasant whereas dysphemism makes life seem easy to understand / straightforward. E.g., Nevada - Ds and Fs are not seen as failing students but emerging groups

Answer 37

Relative language - Sometimes the meaning of words only make sense through comparison - E.g., I go to a small school (compared to UCLA / St Andrews) - this is all relative - E.g., Fast, smart, easy, expensive

Answer 38

Static evaluation = using words to make reality seem more concrete / unchanging than it really is - E.g., You can always count on Emily or Andrew is a nervous guy (assumption that people are consistent and unchanging) --> Andrew is probably only nervous in certain situations - E.g., John is boring --> but he is probably not boring all the time --> you should date the time to avoid static evaluation --> John had nothing to say at lunch yesterday, he was boring

Answer 39

- With about 1 million words in the English language (most out of all) -- uses these words to stand for billions of different facts, experiences - Our vocabulary is limited vs reality is unlimited - E.g., Thousands of oranges in front of you, could you use words to describe it well enough that someone would pick the exact one - E.g., Teaching a child to tie their shoe / play a violin / ride a bike only by words --> typically need to show how it is done

Answer 40

- In the US -- class / occupational / ethnic / musical / regional subcultures - The difference of subcultural differences of music could be punk, EDM, hip hop - Example of regional subcultures in the US: Ohio - "where is the pop?" = soda, Northern California - "hella" = very

Answer 41

- E.g., I promise / I bet you = sealing an agreement or securing the bet itself - E.g., Saying "I love you" can be a commitment to someone - E.g., Cursing can represent being angry

Answer 42

- Someone gives a rousing patriotic speech --> audience has strong patriotic emotions - Significant other saying "I love you" --> feeling warm and giddy inside

Answer 43

- Asking a question and it being answered helps to reduce uncertainty

Answer 44

- Words are key for solving problems, making arguments, clarifying your feelings

Answer 45

- Use of words --> talking with other humans - E.g., 2 people talking

Answer 46

- Some cultures foster a more elaborate vs succinct use (e.g., The Arab language within the Arab culture is incredibly elaborate. In Cairo, Egypt, if the host were to ask if you need more food, a simple "No" does not suffice. You would need to say "No" multiple times or repeat how you "can't eat anymore" or "super full". Without these various repetitions, people would think you are still full) E.g., In the US, when English and Spanish surveys were conducted, surveys conducted in Spanish will on average take longer in comparison to English (elaborate - orally or written) - Formality vs informality -- US is a relatively informal culture, like Australians. Asian cultures place greater emphasis on formality. Korean has 6 different levels of speech -- different verb endings to indicate the degree of formally, ranging from being extremely polite to actively impolite. There are even different degrees for social status / relationships (old friends or strangers). Could be seen by the US as stiff and unfriendly vs view the US as brutal and rude

Answer 47

- Most people's second / third language - With faults -- e.g., Beijing Olympics, the disabled toilets were called "deformed person toilets"

Answer 48

- Bad words / swearing - All languages vary in the use of profanity (e.g., NYC being the most foul city in America -- why? high pressure jobs in America, really dense city, anonymity residents feel in big cities so there is minimal blowback because you will probably never see them again) - The use of language is tied to social circumstances (e.g., small towns in Iowa could have "No Profanity" signs at restaurant)

Answer 49

- Lost its shock value due to profanity's increase use - The word "fuck" is so pervasive that it can be used in any speech (verb, noun, adjective, adverb) --> even split into words. Through the adaptive nature of this word, it becomes a substitute for other words like damn, shuck, golly (even seen less in bathroom grafitti) - Why has profanity become increasingly widespread? Movies (with new regulations, e.g., Devil's Rejects uses "fuck" 562 times despite it being 162 minutes long), 1960s where speech patterns meshed between lower to middle and upper classes, a decade for embracing a more casual American lifestyle and diminished the gap of gender swearing, music, media is relatively profanity free like radios and newspapers

Answer 50

- 19th C America - profane words related to religion are the most taboo - 20th C America - society became more secular --> words related to sex were the most forbidden - Now - less puritanical --> now racial / ethnic / gender slurs are te most forbidden - As American culture becomes more concerned with equality, this type of profane language shifts in importance - As culture changes, things that upset us change

Answer 51

= Desire to have close contact and connect with other people - Very powerful feeling -- why when a relationship ends that it is the most painful - E.g., Old people interviewed, asking what was the most important thing in your life = intimate relationships

Answer 52

1. Physical contact 2. Intellectual 3. Emotional 4. Shared activities

Answer 53

- E.g., touch - Begins before birth -- physical closeness to the mother's heartbeat - Child is nourished by physical intimacy as they grow - rocked, fed, hugged - Children raised without regular touches, caressed, strokes --> many problems (increase problems of growth, mental ability) - For every month a child spends in US orphanage, child IQ drops 1 point per month - This applies to other species -- mother rats lick and groom their babies - some spending more time than others. Those that are licked and groomed for more are proven to be more intelleigence, curious, social, live longer, changes in brain structure - As we grow older, physical intimacy continues to be more important (hugs, kisses, sex)

Answer 54

= Engage and exchange of ideas E.g., A very special kind of closeness can develop when people are exchanging ideas that are important and have meaning to you

Answer 55

= Exchanging important feelings (love, care, concern) - E.g., Telling someone how you feel about them

Answer 56

= Doing things together - From taking a walk, working on a project together, fooling around

Answer 57

- Some relationships have all 4 dimensions and some only have 1 - With any relationships, you can have varying levels of each - Distance is still important even in the closest of relationships (need independence, privacy) - We cannot have many intimate relationshipsW

Answer 58

- On average, females are more often to sharing personal thoughts and feelings - For women, intimacy is built through talk vs men through shared activities

Answer 59

1. Girl with girl 2. Girl with man 3. Man with man

Answer 60

- Generally the first sexual encounter is when the woman permits / give consents - Typically after talking for women - Men see sex as intimacy forming

Answer 61

- E.g., In the US, it is normal to hold hands and kiss in public whereas this is frowned upon in Saudi Arabia

Answer 62

1. Physical appearance 2. Similarity 3. Complimentarity 4. Reciprocity 5. Exchange 6. Competency 7. Proximity 8. Disclosure

Answer 63

- Handsome men and beautiful women are seen differently to the rest = more social, interesting, charming (e.g., handsomer criminals tend to get lighter sentences, more likely to help when a beautiful person asks and less likely to ask a beautiful person for help) - What makes someone physically attractive? Strong agreement across cultures (study in the US where people were asked to rate racially and ethnically diverse people --> remained a strong agreement on who was physically attractive and not), you go to a different country and see their models, actors, beauty queens = all physically attractive, hard-wired - Men are attracted to narrow waists (send message of virginity according to evolutionary psychologists and signal higher reproductive ability), fuller lips, big eyes, long hair - Women are attracted to height, muscles, broad shoulders (prefer more masculine looking men during fertile phases of the menstrual cycle vs androgynous looking men during non-fertile) - Variation among personal taste and some cultural differences (e.g., Japan -nape of a woman's neck is seen as a point of beauty and there are hairstyles and clothes that try to emphasize that) - In times of fewer resources, plumper women seem to be the ideal (50 and 60s vs 70s and 80s, plumper vs slimmer in Playboy Magazines) - Evidence that it is hardwired - study gave infants (3 months old) photos of people's faces and strongly approved of the attractive ones (stared longer) - Is the case where you get to know someone and they become increasingly physically attractive - Important for both genders, but more emphasis for men (emphasis on youth and beauty) whereas women place more emphasis on their partner's finance and resources (men do not care about this) - When a woman makes more than the man -- lower chance of a relationship, higher chance of a divorce

Answer 64

- Comforting to know someone that has similar values, class, interest, race, education level - Drawn to people who we perceive to be like us, tend to like people that like what we like (validating, reinforces our sense of right and wrong) - If you are similar, you can predict what the other person would do (less uncertainty) - Getting along with the same people is also important - Similar ability in intelligence

Answer 65

- "Opposites attract" = differences can be attractive and strengthen connections when they are complementary - E.g., She is more social and can get him more involved in social situations - E.g., Bot like talking and neither like to listen --> example of differences that do not compliment - Strains can occur when control issues are disputed (e.g., husband controls finances and wife controls interior design ---> now wife also wants to control finances) - Successful couples find ways to balance their similarities and differences

Answer 66

- Reciprocity = you liking a person and the other person liking you back - Knowing other people like us can be a strong source of attraction - Do not feel good about people who attack us - Bolsters self-esteem, rewarding, confirms self-concept of being an attractive and likeable person (after we find out someone likes us)

Answer 67

- We seek out people who can give us good stuff (rewards, benefits) - Cross-benefit analysis = analyzing whether getting involved with this person is a good idea (e.g., in a friendship, you may need to hear your friend's guy problems over and over again but you put up with it because they are a great person etc. or he is richer and older = gives her power and prestige vs she is youthful and beautiful = gives him physical attraction) - Expectations = people in time come to expect good things - e.g., girl who normally talks to 8s is approached by a 4.5 that has more benefits --> deny him because she believes she deserves better (using past experiences as an example - plays a big role in cost-benefit analysis)

Answer 68

- Tend to be attracted to competent people (talented, people with skills we want to learn / wish we had etc.) - Not too competent - do not want to make us feel bad in comparison - Study where peopel are shown videos of someone interviewing for a job and asked who is the most attractive (same person under 4 different scenarios = 1. superior ability and blunders - spills coffee, 2. superior ability and no blunder, 3. average ability blunder, 4. average ability and no blunder --> most attractive was 1. superior ability who blundered, superior ability no blunder, average ability no blunder, average ability with blunder)

Answer 69

= How physically close you are (geographically) - We create relationships with people you interact with frequently (best friends = you see frequently) - Allows you to get more information - Can benefit from this, in comparison to a long distance relationship - Increased possibility of liking someone more - E.g., LDR high school couple that went to different schools --> most not lasted - LDRs are now easier and more successful than ever (before, a call from US to Japan for 10 minutes could have costed $130 but now with facetimes, social media, cheaper air fares)

Answer 70

= Telling people important information about yourself (similar shared experiences, attitudes) - When someone self-discloses to you, it is rewarding --> feel good to be trusted and respected - Tend to like the other person because you have opened up to them (trust them) - Both ways it feels good - The closer you are to someone, the more likely you self-disclose - Reciprocity is important = when you disclose, you expect the other person to do the same. If they do not, you would stop - Needs to be at an appropriate time and stage in the relationship

Answer 71

= Limited difference, mainly because of the gender of the people - E.g., Gay couples have more sex than heterosexual coules at the start

Answer 72

- Flirting is relatively similar across the world - Women use the same signals to show they are interested to men - Darwin - the first step of flirting is how women decide the process by permitting the courtship vs men approaching (second stage) - Men often stare at women but women rarely respond. When they do respond, a woman may smile and gaze back at him, looking away

Answer 73

1. Coy = to be artfully shy or reserved - Woman would give a coy look to a man (E.g., toss her hair back) - Promise-withdrawal seqeuence 2. Gaze is the most crucial, pupils dilating shows a sign of intense interest - Calls for a response, desire to return interest or not - Woman could walk away, gaze back and smile 3. Before the response, your body subconsciously has displacement gestures - Displacement gestures = things you do with your body when you are thinking about how to respond (alleviate nervous energy) 4. Response and smile = if she returns his gaze and smiles --> sign of interest, availability and attraction - Anthropologists say there are around 18 types of smiles we give from greeting your neighbor to seeing your long distance best friend

Answer 74

1. Signs that they are interested in finding people - Men = standing tall, adjusting his clothes - Women = putting herself in the line of sight to someone she is interested in, checking lipstick, parading around, tilting her head, looking at POI and then looking away - A male response is to invite her to dance - A lot of flirting is subconscious 2. "I am harmless" gestures and postures = Show safety rather than dominance, encourage reciprocal attention, invite social contact without pressure - Palms up, shoulder shrug (signifying helplessness), being playful and childish (similar to wolves), found that a shrug and tilted neck is commonly seen when people who are sexually attracted to each other are having their first conversation 3. Use of the voice 4. Use of the touch 5. The eyes

Answer 75

- Before this, non-verbal acknowledgement is very important before the man approaches - Initially engage in meaningless conversation (tone, inflection - gentle, smooth, sweet) - Laughing more than usual is a sign of flirting - Phatic communication = communication to open up a channel of communication (e.g., a guy approaching a girl at the party and mentioning the change of weather into May Gray - not to talk about thew eather but open up a channel, purposely indirect to prevent being offputting) - Begin engaging in small talk (e.g., who else you know at the party). The ost important message is whether the person is interested to keep talking to you. Small talk is non-threatening common knowledge, maintain your balance, experience other person's emotional tone (receptive? as nice as he looked from across the room?), personal questions or judgemental questions asked too soon, talk about yourself too much, political or religious views too soon = all a turn-off

Answer 76

- Touch occurs after the voice - E.g., Person leaning forward, moving his foot closer to hers if they are standing - Cues must be returned if this progresses (mating dance), importance of reciprocity - In a heterosexual arrangement, female typically touches first (e.g., she laughed and touched him on the forearm) - Post reciprocity in touch, continuing to talk and touch may lead to body synchrony (e.g., shoulders align, mirroring each other's actions - he crosses his legs and she crosses her leg) - If a sexual encounter occurs from this, the man typically takes the lead

Answer 77

- Eye contact - might last for a split second but is very powerful - Can lead to confusion = Is he looking at me? Do I know him? Is there something in my teeth? Confusion can last for a few seconds on the rest of our lives (fear we are making a mistake / being foolish) - Corroboration = support with initial proof (e.g., he looks at her and she concludes that he is interested --> he repeats his look to let her know that she is right, or simply smiling) Moving from eye-contact in both cases to making contact - Eyes express ourselves with nuance and depth (can attract or repel with the "lingering gaze" or "cold stare")

Answer 78

- Payoff for each sex differs - Female only have so much time (obligatory 9 month commitment per child) and limited number of eggs (selective and want a man with good genetic traits like being healthy, strong --> producing the best possible offspring) - Coyness in females is a way to test their partner for commitment (not seen among species where men are only needed for sex) - Want to find a man who will commit time and resources to raise the child - In contrast, men have unlimited number of sperm --> increases likelihood that his genes would carry on --> want to have the most number of offspring as possible - Female's promise-withdraw sequence = series of tests (e.g., flirtatious coy looks). In a club - woman noticing a guy is eyeing her, she looks over and they look eyes, then she withdraws and looks away (sending a message that she is hard to win)

Answer 79

= One of the major types of non-verbal language, anything we do with our body - Adults hold back more, learn to mask our feelings unlike babies (from the fear of getting hurt) - Body language to prevent people from coming up to you (e.g., tensing up, stiff jaw) - "She gave him the cold shoulder" - Slouchy stance, showing boredom and unattractive - On the use of space: if women are interested, they would invite men into their personal space (e.g., tilting head in his direction, leaning forward in his direction), not touching but getting close to him. If the man is not interested, he might lean back to create more space / cross arms across his chest - Speaking softly so he has to get closer to hear him - Ambiguities involved, difficult to read all these things --> critical self-doubt when nervous could prevent anything from happening (too many blows from the ego after thinking its flirty could lead to a blow to the ego)

Answer 80

- If you are accidentally staring = NO! People do not want to be stared at, direct threat. E.g., Gawking (staring with mouth open, people feel like an object), glares = express a sense of aggression vs admiration and respect, wink = playful and flirtatious but also has its mistakes, elevator eyes = exploring below the neck can also make the people feel like an object

Answer 81

- Small group dynamics = like wolves, we travel in packs (e.g., going out with your girl friends to a club). If a male is interested in one of them, gets rejected, proceeds to ask the second and third --> turned down because no one wants to be a second / third option

Answer 82

- On average, women tend ot be more aware of the flirting things going on between them - On average, men are more likely to misinterpret her actions (e.g., thinking the girl is so into him vs she is debating)

Answer 83

- Direct sexual approaches work on men = dressing seductively, dancing close and sexily - Showing care, and conveying some emotional attachment work better on women

Answer 84

1. Initiating stage 2. Experimenting stage 3. Intensifying stage 4. Integrating stage 5. Bonding stage 6. Differentiating stage 7. Circumscribing stage 8. Stagnation stage 9. Avoiding stage 10. Terminating stage

Answer 85

- Show that you are interested in making contact with this person and a person worth meeting - E.g., Handshakes, small talk, sit near someone in a class hoping you will end up talking to them overtime - Phatic communication could come into play - Nonverbal signalling like smiling

Answer 86

= Seeking out things that you have in common with someone else and qualities you desire - E.g., Figuring out you both like to ski, asking where they go - Small talk is functional here - Way to audition the other person - see if they are worth pursuing as a boyfriend or girlfriend - E.g., First date is similar to a job interview (other than the chance of sexual acts after) - Self-disclose more, develop attraction

Answer 87

= Truly interpersonal relationship begins to develop - Express attraction to other person (indirect at the start by spending more time, doing favours for them, getting to know the other person's friends / family, take effort to look good --> direct communication like "I like you" --> "I love you" - Commitment grows as you move through the stage (doubts still exist --> testing of commitments, potentially asking for proof of commitment like "Do you really like me?" or testing if they get jealous) - Testing behavior decreases as people get closer

Answer 88

= Getting closer, relationship grows, you take on an identity as a social unit - E.g., Invitations address to both - Social circles merge around as a pair - People start taking on each other's commitments (e.g., spending Thanksgiving with their family) - Common shared objects from "our book" to "our cat" - Start taking up their own idioms like "babe" or games that no one understands but them - Sense of obligation grows, wanting to provide the other person with resources like money and time - Less polite - Expect mroe of the other person - "I feel so much a part of you"

Answer 89

= Symbolic statement / gesture to show the world the relationship exists - E.g., To get a license to be married (making a formal display, public display of an exclusive relationship), declaring in front of the world and not only in the privacy of your behaviour, generate social support - Socially and legally obligated to the other person - E.g., Go on social media and change relationship status

Answer 90

= You get closer and closer with similarities, commonalities --> need to re-establish individual identity - Shift in focusing back on yourself - How are we different? How am I unique? - Occurs after someone expresses their first constraint (e.g., married couple - husband wants to go to a family renunion and wife expresses that she does not enjoy them and wants to stay home instead, or workers liking a company --> no wage increase as expected --> differentiation) - Creating space for the relationship and to be individuals - Occur through direct confrontation like "I need my space" or indirect confrontation like "that look" shows she needs to be left alone

Answer 91

= Decline in the quality and quantity of communication - Some dissatisfaction that arises (e.g., Did you have a good day at work? "What is for dinner" as the response) - Less romance, avoiding each other, more arguments - Potential suppression of the problem, hiding / not admitting the decline to ourselves or others - Static rather than dynamic, withdrawing rather than discussing arguments

Answer 92

- Not growing anymore as a relationship - Unenthusiastically having the same conversation, same routine -- no longer a sense of novelty, lack of joy - Nothing to talk about - If it becomes too unpleasant = majorly avoiding each other

Answer 93

= Creating distance with each other - Making excuses like "too busy I can't see you this week" or being more direct like "Please do not call this week"

Answer 94

- Might include a summary dialogue fo the relationship and expressed desire to distance - E.g., Nasty confrontation, legal document in the mail, phone call - Cost-escalation strategy. want to end but too scared so increase the cost so that other people will end it (e.g., cheating on the other person) - Pseudo-de-escalation strategy = no guts to end so they fake the relationship should slow down by taking a break or being friends - Withdrawal strategy avoiding the other person, reducing contact, not returning messages / phone calls anymore (fading away - used to text back fast and now taking longer) - Fait accompli strategy = direct straightforward statement that the relationship is over, opposite of fading away, sometimes includes the classic "we have to talk" - Can be short / long and drawn out, some couples keep breaking up and getting back together - Issues could be sudden or gradual, deciding whether to fight for them etc. - Degree of intimacy --> closer they were needs more justification to end (e.g., with children, decades long) - Common reasons include the characteristics of an individual or lack of fulfilment (e.g., sex was bad) or lack of intimacy (e.g., stopped doing things as a couple), potential 3rd party of an affair

Answer 95

- Not to suggest that all relationships follow the same trajectory, more complicated than that - Whatever stage your relationship is in, there are often elements of different stages at the same time (can have moments avoiding each other to moments of intensifying stage, on and fof) - No relationship is totally stable (shift between stages forward and backward / stagnate. The cycle can repeat itself over and over again), can "recapture the old fire" - Cost-benefit analysis = smart and kind vs weird friends (most prominent when thinking about terminating the relationship)

Answer 96

= Communicating without using words, elaborate code written nowhere but understood by all

Answer 97

1. Kinesics 2. Paralanguage 3. Space 4. Time 5. Artifacts 6. Environment

Answer 98

= Deals with the body 1. Emblems 2. Illustrators 3. Affect displays 4. Regulators 5. Adaptor 6. No clean category -- general / physical characteristics, body temperature and smell, touch

Answer 99

= Body movements directly translatable to a word or phrase (e.g., peace sign, middle finger, thumbs up). Some things can mean different things (cultural specificity) - e.g., in Sri Lanka, slow sideways movement to the head means yes whereas in the US, this means no. There are universal ones shared by other species, like the "yuck face". Often used when verbal language is not an option.

Answer 100

= Body movements accompanying and illustrating messages (e.g., "He was crazy" + brain scrambling movement) to emphasize and accent a word or phrase (e.g., "No" while pounding on te podium), used to depict the pacing or rhythm of the event (e.g., "He went on and one and on" and adding hand movements) or to repeat (e.g., "Go North" and point North as you say that)

Answer 101

= Body movements depicting emotion with no verbal message , e.g., shoulders slumped and head down to show that you are sad, or facial expressions to show that you are embarrassed / excited / happy

Answer 102

= Movements from the body that maintain and coordinate the back and forth flow between people, e.g., slow and deliberate nod to show that you like what the speaker is saying / urge them to continue or tapping your toes to tell someone to hurry up, or handshake to begin a conversation - Intricate and complex, like a handshake (firm = self-confident, "you can count on me", bone-crushing = intending to intimidate, limp = insecure, obligated to shake your hand but do not want to) - To end a conversation = look away for a long period of time, rapid nodding, leveraging (getting up from the seat). There are cultural differences - e.g., Japan some bow to end (different ones for different statuses and relationships)

Answer 103

= Body movements to adapt / feel comfortable - E.g., Having conversation with someone but do not know how to reply yet --> scratch head - Some can be cultural (e.g., Japanese women take their hair and put it around their mouth when they feel ashamed) - Can manipulate objects, like playing with a paper clip when you are public speaking

Answer 104

- General physical characteristics = body shape, height, body proportion, height, hair color and cut, skin color, posture (speaks to everyone differently, e.g., someone shuffling across the street would be a good target for a street mugger) - Impression after shaking someone's hand = warm vs cold vs clammy - If someone smells nice and sweet vs stinky - Recent study = men's sweat smells differ to when they are sexually aroused vs not, and women can unconsciously tell. Mothers and babies know each other's smells (pads saturated with mother's breast milk vs neutral smell --> preferred mother's smell) - Some cultures, female shave their underarms and legs while some do not - Height conveys stature and power (e.g., study showing high correlation between taller US Presidential candidates win), strong cultural norm where men are expected to be taller than the women, and if not, they are more powerful in another aspect (e.g., wealth) - Eyebrows, eyes and forehead are the most authentic part of the face - Study of the handshake: in a study where a quarter was left in the phone booth, it was found that if the stranger who took the quarter was approached by the same guy, a handshake to introduce himself made the event of the people lying significantly decrease - Kissing is across species (also an example of touch, e.g., elephants swirl their nose trucks around and parrots press their breaks together, examples of affirmative gestures of a kiss) - For monkeys, handshakes are a form of reconciliation, occur after a fight - Couples in a cafe - US couples touched 2x every 30 minutes, French couples touched 110x every 30 minutes - Some are hard-wired actions (e.g., athletes after they lose - heads in their hands, even blind athletes react the same) -- universal across cultures

Answer 105

= Vocal but nonverbal aspects of speech - Using your voice but not your words 1. Vocal qualities = background characteristics of a speaker's voice (pitch, tempo, rhythm, articulation) 2. Vocal segregates = substitutes for words (e.g., "uh-huh" for yes or "shhh" for quiet) 3. Vocal fluences = uncodified sounds used to fill in gaps of silence (e.g., uhhhh when a speaker does not want to stop talking, or "mmmm" "aahhh" to show your understanding). Verbal fluence would be "like" (filler) 4. Vocal qualifier = utterances of your voice to convey emotional state (e.g., speaking in a loud volume to indicate excitement or intensity, drawl of voice for lack of intensity like "Miiiiicheal") 5. Vocalizations = laughing, crying, belching, burping, swallowing (can be vocal qualifiers - e.g., talking through yawning = boredom) 6. Pauses and moments of silence - making a point and pausing for effect, conveying to the other person that if they want to talk they can chip in (length of pauses differs between culture), silent treatment to the boyfriend to show frustration. - This is all culturally variable (our volume differs between a loud volume in a library / football game. Americans typically speak louder than the Japanese) - Accents are an example as well

Answer 106

- Fixed features like walls, semi-fixed features like the arrangement of desks - If a group invovled in cooperation = sit next to each other vs competing = sit across from each other (can tell the dynamic through the use of space) - In high-rise buildings, the most prestigous people have their offices in the top corner floor - Use of personal space (little protective bubbles surrounding us), can differ between variables (1. closeness - standing closer to your mother than a stranger, 2. culture - in the US there is typically 3 feet within a conversation vs more space in East Asian cultures, 3. gender - men typically take up more space, relating to power dynamics - e.g., manspreading vs sitting with knees together, like in Korea this was more evident, 4. emotion - someone really stressed needs more personal space vs someone at ease or confident - Territory = e.g., most students sit in the same spot every class. If someone were to sit in your seat, you would kind of annoyed. Also home field advantage in sport games. Territory moves with your car as you drive the car. If someone violates that = e.g., beeping - Lighting can influence space (e.g., dimly-lit venues encourage peopel to get more physically close to each other, encouraging intimacy. E.g., Nightclubs, intimate restaurants = and people go to these places to be more intimate. Lights coming on at a club) - Space works for other species as well - e.g., birds on a wire (nicely spaced, potentially grouped) - Crowds can be a good thing too - e.g., concerts, movie theatre (the more people the better the atmosphere)

Answer 107

- Who keeps who waiting and for how long? Message in that! - E.g., Waiting 45 minutes for your lawyer not that important to your lawyer - Time you spend with someone shows how important you are to them (e.g., Gf hangs out with you 1x a week) - Punctuality - showing up on time is a sign of respect. (US - punctuality is valued, 5 minutes is no big deal, anything more needs an explanation. Most leave after 25-30 minutes. In Southern Mexico = much more chill of a culture, party started 3 hours after than intended)

Answer 108

- We communicate with things / objects = clothing, bags, laptops, cars (material possessions) - Price of a Rolls Royce is so much more than a good functioning car. Why do people purchase? To show status and wealth and luxury - I am rich and important - Cars are often used as artifacts in movies to signify characters e.g., convertible = risk taker, adventurous, domesticated minivan = typical suburban white family - Clothing can tell us one's social position, level of sophistication and success (e.g., 83% pedestrians followed a well-dressed jaywalker vs 43% when the same guy was in lower status clothing) - People can be used as artefacts (e.g., hanging out with the popular kids in high school despite not actually liking them. Wanting to send the message that you were cool and could hangout with them)

Answer 109

- Surrounding environment to convey messages about yourself (e.g., furniture, shelves, colors, lighting, music) - Study shown the inside of someone's home and asked people to infer the owner's personality (relatively accurate) - Classrooms = bright colors can stimulate brain activity, students who sit front and center do better in exams - Restaurants = dim lighting, piano playing, candlelight, table spacing, comfortable chairs vs bright lights, hard and uncomfortable chairs, pop music - Meant to influence behavior (e.g., outside store displays aiming to draw you in --> decompression zone = adjusting to lighting and temperature, will put the most important products right past this zone) - E.g., To go to te supermarket and buy milk - always at the back because this is a common thing to buy (spoils fast). Studies show that the more time a person is spent shopping, the more likely they will buy something

Answer 110

- Must be understood in context (e.g., people crying in a wedding vs funeral) - Cultural variability can influence the meaning - Often, non-verbal communication are packaged -- multiple ways of non verbal communication to send a message (e.g., angry = tighten up body, clenched fists, face goes red, clenched jaw)

Answer 111

No! Majority of communication is ignored, forgotten quickly or misinterpreted

Answer 112

Hearing is the physiologically-censored process of receiving a sound and transmitting that sound to the brain, whereas listening is more psychological and processed by the brain

Answer 113

1. Attending skills 2. Following skills 3. Reflecting skills

Answer 114

= Giving your physical attention to someone else - Non verbal communication that indicates you are paying careful attention to the person speaking - e.g., make the speaker more animated, engaging - Speaker wants a listener who wants to hear what they are saying, is there for him / her - Listening with your whole body 1. Posture of involvement 2 Appropriate body motion 3. Eye contact 4. Non-distracting environment

Answer 115

= Demonstrate a relaxed alertness of the body - "I'm comfortable with you, I understand the importance of what you are saying" - E.g., Body leaning slightly forward, similar to the saying: "on the edge of their seats" - Facing the other person squarely, at the same level (rejection = "gave me the cold shoulder") - Maintaining an open position with arms and legs not tightly crossed - Situating oneself at an appropriate distance (anxiety occurs when you are too close / too far away)

Answer 116

- Non-moving / non-blinking = not listening, like talking to a wall - Moving your body in response to the speaker - Avoid distracting motions / gestures (e.g., fiddling with your keys, shifting weight, cracking knuckles, texting)

Answer 117

- Enables the speaker to appraise a listener's receptiveness to their message and listener to understand the speaker's deeper non verbal communication (with their eyes) - Occasionally shifting gaze to speaker's face to another part of their body (e.g., hand gesture) - Bad = staring at speaker, looking around the room, looking away when the speaker looks at you

Answer 118

- No physical barriers (e.g., desires - associated with superiority, could be like more hostile). When a speaker is behind a desk = more of a role-playing like doctor and patient, harder to read body language - Minimum of noise (TV, radio, other people talking)

Answer 119

- Don't divert / interrupt with too many questions or demands, want to let the speaker direct 1. Door-opener 2. Minimal encourager 3. Questions 4. Attentive silence

Answer 120

= Non-coercive invitation to talk - Form of communication style used to express concern. allow the perosn you are talking to know you are open to discuss - Send nonverbal cues when we are bored / excited to talk --> encourage to talk when noticed - E.g., "tell me more" - Most of the time we close the door by giving unwanted advice, judging - E.g., Observations of body language = you look upset, do you want to talk about it? - Silence to let the other person decide if they want to talk, showing attending skills at the same time (sometimes this is enough, all depends on personality, relationships etc.) - Helpful to reflect on the difficulty of opening up

Answer 121

= Simple responses that encourage the speaker to tell their stay in their own way while keeping listener active - Signs that you are with the speaker (say little but encouraging, e.g., "Oh?" "I see" "Really?" "So?") - Could also repeat a few of the speaker's keywords / last words - Paralanguages, facial expressions can support this

Answer 122

- Not too many to avoid directing conversation - Open vs closed. Closed = questions asking for a short and specific response (yes or no), open = provide speaker the space to talk about their thoughts, do not suggest an agenda

Answer 123

- Using silence can free a speaker up - to feel / express themselves / time to think about what to say, go at their own pace - A lot of listeners talk too much - Uncomfortable with silence --> can nudge the speaker forward - Attending to the other person with their body language, observing their non verbal communication, ponder what has been said / how the other is feeling, think about what to say next - Excessive silence can hinder good communication

Answer 124

= Reflecting back on what has been communicated to you 1. Verbal facts and ideas, paraphrase 2. Nonverbal

Answer 125

- E.g., Use of the paraphrase what the other person was said to make sure you understand - Paraphrase = Concise response to a speaker that restates the essence of the speaker's message in the listener's own words (focusing on the message content, convey understanding - can lead to feeling validated = encouraging the speaker to go further)

Answer 126

1. Friendly line = just want to get to know the other person (e.g., "Would you mind some conversation while we wait for the bus?") 2. Offbeat line = icebreakers that come form a left field (e.g., "Do you think we are ever going to switch to the metric system?") 3. Humorous line = attempting to make the other person laugh (e.g., "So what's a nice girl like you doing in an elevator like this?") 4. Altar line = trying to be smitten (e.g., Let's go buy a fridge / You look like my 2nd wife (only had 1)) 5. Seductive = demonstrates both romantic and sexual interest (e.g., "You are the sexiest woman in the room.") - To be dramatic but not dirty, mischevious - Want to know if the other person is sexually attracted to you before using the line

Answer 127

= Reflecting back on emotions of the speaker - Mirroring back the speaker's emotions is crucial - E.g., When you see someone is sad, you usually get a sympathetic expression or joy and you smile

Answer 128

- One lie does not usually suffice --> gradually builds upon another - Truth is easier to remember - Widespread lying destroys the fabric of a relationships - Study shows that college students averaged lying 2x a day - Most lies are told for selfish reasons (to benefit ourselves)

Answer 129

1. To save face 2. To avoid conflict or tension 3. To guide social interactions 4. To expand or reduce our relationships 5. To gain or protect power / resources 6. To protect ourselves or people from punishment

Answer 130

- To prevent embarrassment of you / the other person - Sometimes kinder to be dishonest - To cover up your own mistakes and make yourself look better - e.g., the invitation must have gotten lost in the mail - E.g., Telling someone you think they look good

Answer 131

- Tell your friend that you are not annoyed at their teasing - you are annoyed but want to avoid the hassle and conflict

Answer 132

- Makes interactions go more smoothly - E.g., Pretending to be excited to see someone that you dislike - Fake interest in your dinner companion and boring stories

Answer 133

- E.g., Meeting someone for the first time - they say they go skiing a lot and you say that you ski a lot too (lying to make yourself look good and build a connection, you have not skied for five years) - E.g. "I have a boyfriend" when you don't want to reject someone

Answer 134

- E.g., Government tells official lies to protect individuals - E.g., Student claiming they are a graduating senior and gets a PTE code for the class, but lied to get the resource of the class

Answer 135

- People always lie when they get caught cheating

Answer 136

= LOST OF TRUST - Start questioning what was even true? - The closer your relationship was, the more betrayal you will feel - Major deceptions can lead to the end of a relationship - Lying is a very important issue of relationships - deception = intentional act that the source knows is not true. Other ways of showing misleading information without a straightforward lies (e.g., changing the topic of conversation, people tell half-truths)

Answer 137

- Relatively casual (not too serious / important) - Most liars also tend to be confident that their lies are bought / accepted - Liars are more likely to think that the lie is less harmless than the recipient believes - Extroverts tend ot lie more as they care more about what other people think of them - Frequent liars are not always successful ones

Answer 138

- Men are more likely to lie about how much resources they have, commitment levels - Women are more likely to exaggerate how attractive others view them, fake orgasming in sex, promise sex and do not give in - Less likely to lie in relationships in general but we also tend to see the biggest lies in relationships (cost of telling the hard truth could potentially be too high and increase desire to hide (e.g., cheating))

Answer 139

- Lying to people we are close to make us feel uncomfortable / bad / less intimate - Lying in a close relationship undermines your trust in the person you are lying to (deceiver's distrust)

Answer 140

Viewing the recipient of the lie as less honest / trustworthy (partly because you think they are just like us, makes us feel better)

Answer 141

= We assume that the other person is usually telling the truth - Our accuracy of detecting deception can decrease as you get increasingly intimate, let your guard down - Tell fewer lies in closer relationships as this would violate the principles of trust and honesty

Answer 142

- Men are more likely to lie about their height, wealth vs women more likely to lie about their height and weight - We are more cautious (when it is too good to be true, we often assume the worst - e.g., catfish) - We have a tendency to be honest online with people we already have relationships with vs face to face (reluctant to lie when everything is written out)

Answer 143

- Often lie in job resumes ot get the job (qualifications) - At work: taking credit for someone else's job, to cover up their mistakes, engaging in private activities (porn sites, online purchases)

Answer 144

1. Equivocation = using the fact that words have more than one commonly accepted meaning (e.g., denying a date because you have "other plans" aka being in bed by 9pm) 2. Hinting (e.g., stop talking to the person - "I know you are so busy I better let you go"), success depends on whether the other person can take the hint

Answer 145

- Put yourself in their position - would you want to be lied to? - If they found out, would they thank you for lying to them? - Consider people's motives for lying? To help them or yourself?

Answer 146

1. Communication can be intentional or unintentional - some is deliberate (e.g., asking boss for a raise, planned words carefully) vs other times you could simply be muttering something to yourself and friend hears it (impatient shifting - most are unintentional) 2. All behavior has the potential to communicate - to confront / avoid, act emotional / put on a poker face. Decoding people's messages could be wrong - e.g., take your sarcasm seriously but regardless, communication still occurs 3. Communication is irreversible and unrepeatable = impossible to not receive a message despite wanting to take it back / erase our words or acts and replace with others. Sometimes can further clarify / apologize etc. but cannot take it back

Answer 147

Sex refers to biology, biological determined differences between male and female (physical characteristics, chromosomes) vs gender differences = social and cultural definitions of male and female behavior (ideas about masculinity that are culturally derived, how we dress, hobbies behaviors) - Gender roles have changed immensely - e.g., women 100 years ago = dutiful wife, centered at home with family and now appropriate for women to be working - Gender is dependent on culture and can change quickly vs biology is a slow change

Answer 148

- Men on average tend to be taller and bigger - On average, women's hearts are smaller and beat faster - Women on average live longer than men do - Men have up to 20x more testosterone than women do (aggression, determination, confidence) - Case study: boy got his penis burnt off in a surgical procedure --> doctor advised parents to raise him like a girl after giving him surgical female anatomy --> this did not work, became a boy again when he grew older

Answer 149

- From the start, boys and girls are treated differently: boys are tousled with more vs girls are caressed more, talked to more - With the creation of contraception and the pill, women are now not always child-bearing but can pick to not even have children anymore - E.g., Japan - women typically expected to talk in higher pitches than normal, this has diminished overtime - Women are using profanity more (used to not be seen as lady-like)

Comm 10 Midterm Flashcards

(173 cards)