Exam study Flashcards
(20 cards)
4 facts on divorce
1) Men and women are getting married later (29 - 30)
2) Couples are living together before marriage
3) Higher chance for divorce rate if you get married young or live together before marriage
Current divorce rate 32%-44%
What is Sternbergs triangular theory of love
1) Intimacy: Feelings of closeness, connectedness and boundedness
2) Passion: Drives that lead to romance, physical attraction and sex
3) Commitment: In short term, decision that one loves a certain other. In long term, ones committed to maintain that love
Intimacy + Passion =
Passion + Commitment =
Intimacy + Commitment =
1) Romantic Love
2) Fatuous Love
3) Companionate Love
Intimacy + Passion + Commitment =
Consummate Love
Oxytocin is the
Love, cuddle and bonding hormone
Testosterone and oestrogen
Development of male and female sexuality
sex desire
Epinephrine and norepinephrine
Adrenaline rush
Hert beats faster
Fight or flight
Happens in the presence of potential love partner
Dopamine
Associated with pleasure, motivation and concentration
What is Iatrogenic risk
- Risk that a person who is not symptomatic will become so during or after therapy
Reasons to choose not do do couples therapy
Suspiscions of DV
You know them
Issue is more individual
Extra-marital affairs, child abuse, addictive behaviour?
The therapist may lose battle for structure if they
Fail to decide who the client is
Fail to recognise the relationship starts from first client contact
Don’t stay neutral
Fail to address transference and counter transference
How does neutrality get maintained when it’s obvious one person is damaging the relationship more than the other, or one person is obviously more committed?
Focus more on the pain and emotion than the behaviour
7 forms of DV
Physical: shoving
Sexual: degrading jokes and comments, injury during sex, unwanted touching, coercing consent for sex. Sex is a privilege, not a _____
Verbal: Name calling, berating, put downs
Emotional: Blaming, making women appear unstable, using children, controlling what they wear, mind games
Social: jealousy of other men including – control of who partner can see
Economic: Gives woman all the money and expects her to do everything, the criticises, questions, and checks financial. Deprives woman of all access to money eg no money, no credit cards, no cheque account
Spiritual: Quotes religious books to de-power woman and keep her in a one-down position,
Key characteristics of DV
Fear, Control, Power
Cycle of abuse
Honeymoon forgive me -> tension increase -> abuse/violence -> honeymoon forgive me etc…
Denial at the centre
4 types of DV
Situational violence- triggered by a particular issue (appears to be the most common type)
Intimate terrorism- violence is one-way (often male to female) and is about control
Violent resistance- happens in the context of intimate terrorism- may be about self-protection or about protest
Mutual violent control- struggle for control by both partners
What happens to children in divorce?
1) Most children function well after the initial year or two, despite the pain of the divorce
2) young children are often very confused, frightened and may regress in their toileting habits. Reactions are similar to the loss of a loved one.
3) Adolescents less likely to blame themselves than younger children, can be pushed into ‘false maturity’, suffer depression or be pushed into a risk behaviours.
Stages in Divorce Counselling - Paul
1) Check for signs of life.
2) Perform CPR
3) If there are no indicators of life, consign body to the morgue.
4) Plan funeral
5) Aftermath
What is most important in divorce counselling
Ensuring both partners and children are safe. Safety trumps therapy every time.
