Lecture 4 Flashcards

Question

How do the different components that impact attraction combine?

Answer 1

each component has its own impacts on interaction, but they usually reinforce each other to convey information

Answer 2

each component has its own impacts on interaction, but they usually reinforce each other to convey information

Answer 3

Seeing nonverbal behaviors that resemble our own makes us more charmed & more at ease, interacting with someone that doesn’t mimic us can be stressful

Answer 4

May be hardwired because of mirror neurons that activate when someone is engaging in the same behavior as us, basis for empathy

Answer 5

The sensitivity & accuracy that couples read, decode, & correctly interpret each other’s nonverbal behavior predict the happiness of the relationship

Answer 6

How accurate couples can communicate verbally predicts how happy their relationships will be Spouses that do poorly at nonverbal communication tend to be dissatisfied & when problems occur it’s usually the husband’s fault

Answer 7

women spend more time watching other people eyes than men do so they can read expressions better

Answer 8

process of revealing personal information to someone else, defining characteristic of intimacy, you like a stranger more if you know intimate details about them

Answer 9

Most relationships begin with small talk and then move to deeper topics, following the social penetration theory (relationships develop through systematic changes in communication)

Answer 10

communication will increase in breadth (variety of topics) and depth (personal significance of topics)

Answer 11

we tend match the openness of our disclosures to that of or partners

Answer 12

suggests that self-disclosure and partner responsiveness contribute to the experience of intimacy in interactions It begins when a person shares something personal and self-relevant with a partner. If the partner responds with warm, positive regard, the communicating partner feels understood, validated, cared for, and closer to the other person. Personal disclosures that make people vulnerable invite reciprocal disclosures, which further builds closeness and trust between partners. Doing something novel with a partner invites new opportunities for disclosures and closeness

Answer 13

People know they’re gay before they come out! They usually disclose first to a close friend, and such disclosures usually go well. Tend not to disclose to parents for another year or more (usually Mom) LsGs are much more likely to disclose then Bs

Answer 14

sensitive matters that partners agree, explicitly or implicitly, not to discuss.

Answer 15

state of one’s relationship

Answer 16

Partners who hold many secrets from one another tend to have poor intimacy, but withholding some secrets can also maintain or protect a relationship.

Answer 17

Self-disclosure that fits the situation is associated with high relationship quality in close relationships for several reasons: We reveal more personal information to those we like. We also tend to like others more because we have opened up to them. Others like us more when we self-disclose

Answer 18

Self-disclosure is not only good for our relationships, it’s also good for us. People who have substantive, deep conversations with others are happier and healthier than those who stick to superficial small talk. And expressions of affection are particularly powerful for both our relationships and our personal health.

Answer 19

Discussion of people, relationships & feelings feature more prominently in women’s dialog Men tend to stick to more impersonal matters, such as sports, politics, and celebrities, and they seek a few laughs instead of support and counsel Nevertheless, when we’re chatting online using written messages, we usually can’t tell the sexes apart.

Answer 20

Women tend to speak less forcefully and hedge more than men do, but they are not more talkative overall. Perhaps because women are more concerned with how the message will be received than are men There aren’t big differences in the way men and women talk. But there are meaningful differences in language use from one person to the next, E.g., awful, worse, horrible, annoying à higher in neuroticism

Answer 21

Men tend to disclose less to their partners than women do, but they do disclose more personal information to women than to other men. As a result, interactions that involve women tend to be more intimate than interactions that involve only men. But these differences mostly stem from socialized differences in expressivity

Answer 22

Confuse issues by addressing several topics in once

Answer 23

People that kitchen sink likely wander from topic to topic

Answer 24

Finding faults with anything their partner says

Answer 25

responding to a partner’s complaint with one of their own

Answer 26

Unhappy partners do a poor job of saying what they mean Unhappy partners also do a poor job hearing each other: They jump to conclusions with misreading & wrongly assume that they understand their partners They interrupt to express disagreements frequently

Answer 27

Criticism, contempt, defensiveness, & stonewalling

Answer 28

framing a problem as a deficit in one’s partner.

Answer 29

acting superior and mocking or insulting one’s partner.

Answer 30

Replying with excuses or counterattacks

Answer 31

when someone withdraws to avoid conflicts.

Answer 32

Belligerence and aggressiveness can result

Answer 33

By identifying as plainly as possible a specific and discrete behavior that has upset you; avoid generalities (e.g., don’t say “You always…!”)

Answer 34

Statements that start with “I” and then describe a distinct, specific emotional reaction

Answer 35

combine behavior descriptions with I-statements: “When you did X in situation Y, I felt Z.”

Answer 36

involves repeating a message in our own words and giving the sender a chance to agree that that’s what he or she really meant

Answer 37

When we assess the accuracy of our inferences about a partner’s feelings by asking for clarification and feedback

Answer 38

Communicating that attention and comprehension to our partners so that they know we care about what they’ve said

Answer 39

void the temptation to attribute hostile intent to your partner. Schedule regular meetings for the polite airing of grievances. Don’t keep trading sarcastic insults when you get angry; take a “time out.” Take just six long, slow, deep breaths per minute, and you will calm down, faster than you think.

Answer 40

acknowledges the legitimacy of our partners’ opinions and communicates respect for their positions even when we disagree with them.

Answer 41

Respect for a partner’s point of view can make disagreements much more tolerable

Answer 42

telling the people you love that you love them experience improved neuroendocrine responses to stress & over time it lowers cholesterol levels, heart rates & blood pressures

Answer 43

Engage in less self-disclosure & express emotions less openly & decode other’ expressions less accurately

Answer 44

More talkative, disclose too much too soon

Answer 45

ted to exhibit warmer, more expressive nonverbal behavior, are more affectionate, keep less secrets

Answer 46

A constant stream of superficial & trivial text result in lower satisfaction & happy partners send high proportions of more meaningful messages that contain thoughtful self-disclosure, affirmations, & assurances But it doesn’t give the same rewards as talking in person doe

Answer 47

Acknowledging what the person is going through (like losing a loved one) Respond with something simple such as I’m so sorry or I’ve been thinking of you

Answer 48

Seem more attentive during conversation & look interested Women tend to be better openers than men

Answer 49

the senders gives a confusing message that is difficult to read

Answer 50

received fails to correctly interpret a message that is clear to everyone else

Answer 51

Husbands in unhappy marriages send more confusing messages & made more decoding errors than happy husbands did, no differences in the wives, & the poorer communication was the husband’s fault In unhappy marriages both the husbands & wives understood strangers better than they understood each other

Answer 52

nonverbal insensitivity makes someone a less rewarding partner but once partners become dissatisfied, they tend to tune each other out, causing them to try less

Lecture 4 Flashcards

(76 cards)