Relationships Flashcards
(23 cards)
What are the benefits of a good relationship?
*Greater happiness and life satisfaction
*Improved mental health through emotional support
*Better Physical Health- Fewer physical illnesses, faster post operative recovery, increased longevity
What are the negative effects of poor relationships?
*Poorer cognitive functioning
*Lower physical and mental health
What are the predictors of initial attraction?
*Proximity
*Physical Attractiveness
*Perceived Similarity
*Feeling liked
What are the characteristics of proximity?
*A study on student housing found that friendships are more likely to form when students are in the same building, same floor and near staircases
*Function vs Physical Distance: Functional proximity matters as much as closeness (E.g. crossing paths frequently)
*A study on the police academy found that alphabetical seating and dormitory assignments predicted friendships
Modern Considerations: Internet and digital tools alter how proximity works, long distance relationships show proximity remains important, but in a changed form
Why is proximity important?
*Mere Exposure Effect: Repeated exposure = increased liking
*Availability: Accessible people are easier to befriend as less effort is needed
*Anticipation of Interaction: If we expect to see someone again, we a form a more positive view, we feel more motivated to like them
What are the characteristics/studies on physical attraction?
*Strong predictor of initial liking
*Walster et al. (1996)
1) Dance experiment with university students
2) Matched with random partners (told it was based on personality compatibility)
3) Evaluated date on attractiveness, personality, intelligence, desire to meet again
4) Findings: Physical attractiveness was the strongest predictor of liking and wanting to meet again, more than personality or intelligence
*Landy and Sigall (1974)
1) Male students graded essays allegedly written by a female student
2) Essays were either good or poor quality
3) Photo Attached: attractive, unattractive or no photo
4) Findings: Attractive photo led to higher essay grade. For poor essays bias against unattractiveness was stronger than bias towards attractiveness
What are some cautions of physical attracitveness?
*Attractiveness stereotype: Attractive people are more intelligent, socially skilled and emotionally balance
*However, these assumptions are often invalid as there is no consistent link with happiness, intelligence or mental health
*Perceptions are Subjective: People are inaccurate at judging how others perceive their attractiveness
*Cultural and contextual factors shape attractiveness judgements
*Smiling Increases Attractiveness: Smiles enhance perceived beauty across contexts
*Attractiveness can have Downsides: Jealousy in same gender relationships and resentment or tension in platonic settings
What are the factors modifying the role of attractiveness?
*Perceived Match: People pair with those of similar attractiveness, known as the matching hypothesis
*Self Esteem: Higher self-esteem, means they are more likely to pursue attractive partners
*Cultural, Gender and Situational Context: Attractiveness norms vary widely across cultures and contexts
What are the characteristics of similarity?
*Law of Attraction: More attitude similarity = more interpersonal attraction (linear relationship)
*A longitudinal study on university housing found that real and perceived attitude similarity predicted friendship
*Other Similarities: Beliefs, interests and values matter
*Perceived similarity (what people think they can have in common with someone) is more important than actual similarity in predicting attraction
*Long Term Findings: Married couples became more similar over 21 years (mental ability and attitudes)
*Dissimilarity: Dissimilarity has stronger negative impact than similarity’s positive effects
What are the characteristics of feeling like/reciprocity?
*We like those who like us
*Cutris and Miller
1) Participants were told by a partner that they liked/disliked them
2) Those told they were liked behaved more warmly, there were in turn liked more by their partner
3) Self Fulfilling Prophecy: Belief in being liked, leads to warmer behaviour which leads to actual liking
4) Implications: Reciprocal liking is a strong, straightforward predictor of attraction, more immediate than similarity or attractiveness
What are the limitations of interpersonal attraction research?
*Early studies on attraction have been criticized for being too narrow
*It focused on dyads (only 2 people), ignoring broader social networks or group dynamics
*Explored initial attraction to strangers, neglecting relationships with acquaintances or friends
*Emphasized passive attraction overactive engagement
*Often treated relationships as things that happened to us rather than ones we actively build and shape
*These studies neglected:The active roles individuals play in forming, developing and maintaining relationships
What is Duck’s approach to relationships?
*He assumed people are active agents who use skills and strategies to initiate and manage relationships
*Relationships are a process, not static, they change as individuals grow and circumstances shift
*Within relationships, multiple elements develop over time including: liking, knowledge, intimacy, shares stories, interdependence, interaction and commitment
What research methods did Duck use?
*Retrospective, Qualitative Methods
*Self reports
*Role playing scenarios
*Interviews with romantic partners or friends
*Student diaries recording daily “significant interactions” over time
What were Duck’s aims?
*Reveal tacit (unspoken) skills and judgments we use in relationships
*Understand how people reflect on an interpret interactions
*Explore when and how factors like similarity actually influence relationship development
What are the 4 dynamic phases that Duck identified in relationship development?
1) Meeting people
2) Getting acquainted
3) Forming and developing relationships
4) Maintaining relationships
Describe phase 1 (meeting people) of Duck’s model
*When we meet someone, we rapidly judge whether we want to engage (decision made in 30 seconds)
Factors Influencing this Judgment:
1) Circumstance: is it a good time, place, activity to meet
2) Openness of the Other Person: Are they welcoming or closed off
3) Judgements of likely Success: Demographic similarity and physical attractiveness
*Important Caveat: Similarity and attractiveness influence initial willingness to engage, but don’t cause a relationship to form
Describe phase 2 (getting acquainted) of Duck’s model
*People assume that relationship progression depends on the other person, not themselves
This Leads to Strategies:
1) Self-Presentation: Acting “normal”, highlighting strengths
2) Nonverbal Cues: Nodding, touching, smiling
3) Question Asking: Showing interest
4) Monitoring: Looking for indirect cues of interest
*This Phase is 2 Sided: Both individuals assess and influence each other, minute behaviours outweigh broad personality traits
Describe phase 3 (forming & developing relationships) of Duck’s model
*There are 4 categories of strategies in this phase
1) Seeking information
2) Affinity Seeking
3) Increasing intimacy
4) Showing the relationship is growing
Describe the category ‘seeking information’ in phase 3 of Ducks model
*Purpose: Reduce uncertainty about the person and the potential relationship
Strategies:
1) Passive- Observing the person in different contexts
2) Active- Asking friends or third parities
3) Interactive- Direct conversations and questions
4) Private Reflection- Mentally replaying past interactions
Filtering/testing Process:
1) Do we match on interest, values and attitudes
2) Do they pass “taboo topic” tests or secret tests that address sensitive topics
3) Information seeking continues throughout relationships, not just early stages
Describe the category ‘affinity seeking’ in phase 3 of Ducks model
Douglas (1987) identified 8 strategies to determine whether the other person wants a relationship
1) Conformity- Asking direct questions to get clear answers
2) Withdrawing- Temporarily pulling away to see if other initiates
3) Sustaining- Keeping the interaction going to assess engagement
4) Hazing- Seeing if they will do favors (signals willingness to invest)
5) Diminishing Self- Downplaying self to see if they still show interest
6) Approaching- Behaviours implying intimacy and closeness
7) Offering- Creating opportunities for the other to approach
8) Networking- Using mutual friends to gather or transmit information
*Most strategies are indirect due to fear of rejection
Describe the category ‘increasing intimacy’ in phase 3 of Ducks model
*Key behaviour- Self disclosure (sharing private info)
Importance:
*We disclose to who we like
*Even among strangers, self-disclosure increases liking
*It higher in romantic compared platonic relationships
*Higher in same gender compared to cross gender friendships
*Norm of Reciprocity: People are more likely to self-disclose if they feel the other person will too
Risks and Strategies:
*Self-disclosure requires judgment and timing
*May “float a topic” before diving in
*Selective disclosure to avoid taboo subjects
*Emotional disclosures build more intimacy that factual ones
Components of Intimacy:
1) Self disclosure (facts and emotions)
2) Partner disclosure
3) Perceives partner responsiveness (feeling understood, validated, accepted and cared for)
4) Intimacy often involves turning points in relationships when disclosure is met with support
Describe the category ‘showing the relationship is growing’ in phase 3 of Ducks model
*Shared activities signal deep ties
*Changes in depth of interaction, frequency & pattern of communication
*People develop a shared narrative or ‘relationship story’, disclosing this to others affirms the relationships legitimacy and seriousness
Describe phase 4 (maintaining relationships) of Ducks model
Maintenance involves active and ongoing behaviours:
*Attending to partners needs
*Continuing Relational Behaviours- Showing interest, information gathering and self-disclosure
*Shared routines and experiences
*Social network- Encouragement/support to stay together and gossip to process and reflect on issues
Managing Ideal Standards: We often stress our partners virtues and downplay their flaws, this helps maintain commitment
