Test 2 Flashcards
(23 cards)
What is true about anger?
Quick Facts:
- In a study conducted in the United States, people reported having in average two to three incidents of anger a week, and even one a day.
- There are labels for situational anger incidents—road rage, sky rage, sideline rage.
- Some things that make us anger are impersonal—an endless phone answering menu—but most are interpersonal.
Cause:
- Emotion connected to perceived unfairness or injustice
- frustration of unmet needs or thwarted desires.
Characteristics:
- cognitive processing decreases. Gottman: “flooding”:–overwhelming, out of control anger
- Men and women have equal feelings of anger, but men are more often instigators and cause more injury
Implications:
- Anger, like conflict, can be constructive when it motivates to stand up for injustices and make positive changes in situations.
- Suppressing anger is bad for you physiologically, creates resentment
- Among Toraja, anger is feared and people who are angry are left alone–different cultural expressions of anger
What is the X-Y-Z Formula?
“When you do X, in situation Y, I feel Z.”
Gottman, Notarius, and Markman describe the X–Y–Z Formula as a communication skill.
When used this model, the other person might:
- Acknowledge the other person’s feelings.
- Clarify the specific behaviors involved.
- Gauge the intensity and importance of the issue.
- Invite the other to work on a solution.
- Make an optimistic relational statement.
Explain the characteristics of assertive individuals
Rancer and Avtgis indicate that assertiveness is “the use of verbal and nonverbal symbols to exert control, to obtain justified rewards, and to avoid violation of one’s rights.”
Assertive individuals are:
- Directive or take charge of situations.
- Comfortable around people.
- Able to stand up for their rights.
- Able to maintain their own convictions or positions.
Explain argumentativeness
Infante and Rancer define argumentativeness as a “trait which predisposes the individual in communication situations to advocate positions on controversial issues, and to attack verbally the positions which other people take on these issues.”
It focuses on the issues, and does not attack the person.
Explain verbal aggressiveness
According to Infante, it is the tendency to attack the self-concepts of individuals instead of, or in addition to, their positions on topics of communication.
Verbal aggressive attacks are against the person—as opposed to argumentativeness, where attacks are against the person’s positions.
There are two essential conditions for bullying to happen. Which are they?
- Power imbalance (can be any type of power)
- Repeated physical, verbal, or other actions to harm another
What are the significant long-term effects of school bullying?
Long term effects on mental health (worse than maltreatment by parents)
Lack of sense of safety, stability, and trust in school–who will be next?
Bullies are more likely to engage in crime as adults
How has the Quakers’ tradition of mediation served as the basis for modern mediation?
Quaker practices of mediation served as the basis for modern mediation in the United States.
Quakers have genuine concern for parties in conflict, and work with them to change the way they perceived themselves, the other parties and the conflict.
A central element in Quakers’ mediation is that they believe in powerlessness, in parties sharing or relinquishing power instead of acquiring power.
What is evaluative mediation and what is the role of the mediator?
Mediator structures process, and has substantive or legal expertise in both mediation and in regarding the field of conflict
Lots of caucus–expertise
Guided, not forced–constant opportunities to back out
What is facilitative mediation and what is the role of the mediator?
Facilitative mediation is common in community centers.
Community mediation services originated in response to urban disorders of the 1960s.
The goals of the community mediation centers were:
- Create a community-based justice system that addressed disputes before they entered courts.
- Strengthen capacity of church, civic, school, and social service organizations to address conflicts.
- Strengthen the ability of citizens to participate in local self-governance through the decentralization of community decision making.
In facilitative mediation:
- Mediator encourages the disputing parties to communicate with one another.
- Joint sessions are typical; parties can hear each other’s points of view.
- The mediator’s objective is to have the parties reach a mutually agreeable solution.
The facilitative mediator:
- Asks questions.
- Summarizes issues.
- Encourages parties to develop options for an agreement.
- Does not make recommendations.
- Does not give advice or opinions.
- Does not predict what might happen if no agreement is reached.
- The facilitative mediator is in control of the process.
- The disputants own the problem and the outcome.
What is transformative mediation and what is the role of the mediator?
Presents opportunities for individuals to change their communication
- disputants set agenda, mediator follows lead
- mediator summarizes and reflects–does NOT try to evaluate case or take a role in agreement creation
This mediation is successful when parties better understand the situation and each other’s perspective
Underlying belief is that conflict is a result of a crisis in communication between parties
Widely used by USPS
Transformative mediation requires advanced training.
What steps would you take if you were asked to conduct a facilitative mediation? What would you consider in the set-up of the mediation?
- There is no collection of information prior to mediation.
- A facilitative mediator conducts a mediation without analyzing the dispute in advance.
- The mediator will work with what the disputants present in the mediation.
- Mediators are not selected for their expertise.
- They reflect the diversity of the community.
- The mediator “owns” the process, but not the dispute.
- Mediator provides a complete introduction to the mediation process because not everybody knows about mediation.
Mediation can take place in any location.
- The main concern should be security.
- A critical aspect in mediation is physical arrangement.
- The most common arrangement is to have disputants seating across the table from each other, with the mediator seating at the end of the table.
- A least desirable arrangement is to have disputants seating next to each other and the mediator seating behind the desk.
- That may suggest that the mediator is the one with the power.
- The mediator should consider how the physical arrangement supports the communication in the mediation.
What are the key principles of facilitative mediation?
In facilitative mediation:
- Mediator encourages the disputing parties to communicate with one another.
- Joint sessions are typical; parties can hear each other’s points of view.
- The mediator’s objective is to have the parties reach a mutually agreeable solution.
What is caucus and how are the characteristics of communication during caucus?
Caucus is a private meeting, during the mediation process, that takes place between the mediator and only one disputant.
It usually takes place after the opening statements.
One or more caucuses may be needed in mediation.
In this part, the mediator communicates differently: he or she becomes more of a coach or teacher.
It helps disputants to explore settlement options and how to present those to the opponent.
The caucus is not an opportunity for the mediator to solve the problem, or to suggest ways to solve the problem.
Because of its confidentiality nature, the information provided in caucus cannot be revealed to opponent, unless the disputant gives express authorization.
Five Useful Negotiation Skills:
- Setting an objective for the mediation.
- Identifying the Worst Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement (WATNA.)
- Using deadline pressure
- Separating demands from problems
- Reframing.
What are the ethical standards a mediator needs to follow?
Standard I. Self-determination. Mediators must ensure parties come to a voluntary, uncoerced, and informed decision, and not threats are made against any of the parties to settle.
Standard II. Impartiality.
Standard III. Conflicts of interest.
Standard IV. Competence.
Standard V. Confidentiality.
Standard VI. Quality of the process.
What must be present for reconciliation to happen?
Reconciliation includes forgiveness, but moves beyond it (requires both parties).
Requires:
- Victim and offender want to remain in the relationship.
- Each believe the other will behave in a benevolent manner.
- They discuss what happened.
- Exchange stories.
- Express the hurt.
- Listen for the remorse.
- Begin to establish trust.
What are the characteristics of restorative justice?
Restorative justice can include communication and even supervised meetings between victims and offenders.
It may also provide opportunities for the offender to provide services to the victim or the community.
The benefits of restorative justice programs are:
Victims have the opportunity to be heard by the offender (not typically provided in criminal trials).
Offenders have the opportunity to apologize directly to the victim and make restitution.
Restorative justice programs have as their primary objective emotional repair for the victim.
Programs based on the restorative justice model include:
Victim–offender reconciliation programs (VORP), or victim–offender mediation (VOM), typically involve the victim and the offender.
Family group conferencing (FGC) involves the victim, the offender, and the family and friends of both parties.
The VORP and FGC typically are generally limited to property crimes and minor assaults and are more frequently applied in the case of juvenile offenders.
Victim–offender mediated dialogue (VOMD) is a newer program for violent crimes postsentencing.
What is true about conflict in organizations?
Issue of power: managers usually don’t experience conflict—other employees with less power do
Takes time and direct cost
Most employees have never received direct training
In a parent-child conflict, what are two necessary elements in understanding the conflict?
- Age of the child / level of development
- Asymmetrical power relationship
In the case of younger children, conflicts typically stem from the child’s anger over goal blockages by parents and the parent’s anger over the child’s misbehavior (Carpenter & Halberstadt).
In the case of adolescents, conflicts with parents are based on violated expectations, a renegotiation of the influence of parents, and the freedom of adolescents to develop independent identities and values (Flora & Segrin).
Parents exercise power when they set limits on acceptable behavior
How can the use of metaphors in mediation be helpful?
p.232: Narrative metaphor
Metaphors allow us to take something that is known and allow us to think about something that is not known
Ex war metaphors are very not helpful
Winslade and Monk indicate that narrative mediation is based on the notion that the way we talk about a conflict shapes the way we perceive and react to it.
Kassing and Waldron summarize studies that show how victims of bullying in organizations eventually must devise revised stories to help explain their victimization.
In narrative mediation, the mediator creates a safe space for the participants to tell their personal stories and then deconstructs how each party is approaching and conceptualizing the conflict.
Also, the mediator helps the parties uncover the assumptions each is bringing to the conflict.
This is often accomplished by talking about the conflict as if it is an externalized object or even as a third person.
The externalized name for the conflict (“argument,” “disagreement,” “incident,” “feud,” or something else) is then solidified by inquiring into the effects it is having on the parties, on the family or workplace, on the relationships between people, and so on.
Why is it important to understand generational and cultural issues when addressing family conflict?
Because we draw metaphors from social discourse and use them to make sense of our experience, it is often more difficult than we might think to establish the facts about what happened.
If the parties are making sense of the conflict from within different cultural narratives, we should not be surprised if they do not fully share the same experience or perceive and talk about it in the same way.
Although family members may all live in the same house and employees work in the same business, they may be from different cultures.
Age difference between parents and children and between managers and front-line employees is enough to qualify them as coming from different cultures.
Even when people share common membership in a cultural category when viewed from the outside, there can still be differences between their individual responses according to the narratives they attend to.
The skills narrative mediation practitioners have learned in dealing with family and organizational conflicts are now being applied to sociopolitical conflicts.
Strategies used to help families and organizations in crisis may help communities and nations resolve some fundamental differences.
What are the necessary parts of a highly effective apology? What characterizes a low effectiveness apology? What words are necessary to say and why?
1) Correctly identify those responsible for the wrong, as well as who needs the apology
2) Acknowledge offending behavior
3) Recognize impact
4) Confirm violation of social or moral contract between parties
5) Communicate remorse
6) Offer explanations
7) Make reparations
In their studies, Weiner, Amirkhan, Folkes and Verette show that “bad excuses” depict the offense as intentional, controllable, stable, and internal.
- Example: Saying that the offender thought the payment was due the following week.
Conversely, “good excuses” depict the offensive behavior as unintentional, uncontrollable, unstable (temporary), and external.
- Example: One of my siblings got sick and I needed to attend to him.
Win-Win Bargaining
Matches to the conflict style of collaborating
PROBABLY MORE HERE
