Scenes 9 & 10: Why Did You Become an Actor? (pg. 47) & Snow White (pg. 48 - 57)

Question 1

(Act II begins)

Answer 1

Hey. What’s up? Mira got stuck in the line for the ladies room so I’m out here filling time until she can make it. I’d like to take some time here for a segment I like to call: meet the actors.

Question 2

Actor: What’s up?

Answer 2

Why did you become an actor?

Question 3

Actor: My parents didn’t love me enough and this is my way of filling the gigantic hole in my heart.

Answer 3

I don’t really like actors.

Question 4

Narrator 1: Sorry I’m late.

Answer 4

All right, we’re ready to go! To Re-Cap:

Question 5

Narrator 1: …And there were no crab people.

Answer 5

Simple, right? Back to our story!

Question 6

Narrator 1: You see, that princess who married the frog had a mother.

Answer 6

Most girls do.

Question 7

Narrator 1: Do you ever wonder why you’re single?

Answer 7

No I know why I’m single.

Question 8

Narrator 1: Anyway, once upon a time-

Answer 8

My standards are too high.

Question 9

Narrator 1: The first dwarf, though, who we will name Dopey-

Answer 9

Cough

Question 10

Narrator 1: Snow White cleans house for the dwarves, then she gets poisoned by an apple, then a prince shows up-

Answer 10

You know, maybe we should just let him rewrite the story.

Question 11

Dwarf 1: Okay, I got another one. I’ve been cursed by a witch and I now have supernatural powers-

Answer 11

Besides, sometimes the originals are…how do you say, bad?

Question 12

Dwarf 1: And now I can animate zombies. I’ve always wanted to animate zombies.

Answer 12

Classics, huh? Let me show you a classic. Here we go- number 191. Lean Lisa.

Question 13

Snow White: Why is it that I have to clean and cook for the dwarves? If I’m a princess, shouldn’t they be cooking and cleaning for me?

Answer 13

Both of you stop, okay? We’re doing a new one, Lean Lisa.

Question 14

Snow White: Never heard of it. Am I beautiful?

Answer 14

You’re lean. So once upon a time, Lean Lisa lay in bed with her husband, Long Laurence.

Question 15

Dwarf 1: Do I get to be Long Laurence?

Answer 15

Yes.

Question 16

Dwarf 1: Quiet your wagging tongue woman!

Answer 16

And she died. The end.

Question 17

Narrator 1: Seriously? That’s what it says?

Answer 17

Right here.

Question 18

Dwarf 1: She’s alive!

Answer 18

I thought you were supposed to be Snow White.

Question 19

Snow White: Can anyone really tell the difference?

Answer 19

Anyway, what I’m saying is that these stories need some spicing up here and there. A new angle. A new way of putting them together.

Question 20

Narrator 1: I know, we could put together a big-budget musical told from the perspective of the witch!

Answer 20

Why don’t we just follow the dwarf’s lead?