05. Close Relationships I

Question 1

Speed-dating Study (Eastwick & Finkel, 2008)

Answer 1

• preferences written down before the date
• preferences did not predict mate selection
• ergo mate selection is random (possibly to decrease incest)

Question 2

Non-Verbal Signals of Romantic interest (Andersen et al., 2006)

Answer 2

• Smiling, increased eye contact
• Pupil dilation (Pronk et al., 2021)
• Synchronized gestures and mimicking (Karremans & Verwijmeren, 2008)
• Touch on face, neck, torso (vulnerable body parts)
• Less distance, oriented toward each other
• Speech (e.g., matching volume and speed of speech, vocal warmth, relaxed speech, laughter)

Question 3

Has technology changed how people meet partners?

Answer 3

Yes. There is an increased use of online dating among young adults (53%) and non-heterosexuals (51%) (Pew Research, 2013)

Question 4

Is online dating better than in person?

Answer 4

Apps supposedly have ‘matching algorithms’ but…
- do not disclose how they work
- studies suggest attraction is random anyway

Question 5

What do experts suggest for successful dating?

Answer 5

• Meet others to find out!
• Be the partner you want (e.g., responsive)
  (Joel et al., 2017)

Question 6

Why is online dating disappointing?

Answer 6

We don’t feel as attracted to others when finding out who they “really” are vs who we thought (or wished!) they were (Ramirez et al., 2015)

Question 7

Interdependence Theory (Thibaut & Kelley, 1959)

Answer 7

A social exchange theory: rewards vs costs of a relationship determine satisfaction

Question 8

Rewards and Costs

Answer 8

They can be tangible (things) or intangible (feelings).
- we pay more attention to costs than rewards (Baumeister et al., 2001)
- 5x as much weight to costs as rewards (Gottman & Levenson, 1992)
- Outcome = Rewards – Costs

Question 9

Why do people stay in relationships?
The Investment Model (Rusbult et al., 1998)

Answer 9

Satisfaction + investments + alternatives = commitment

Question 10

Investment Pros and Cons (Rusbult & Martz, 1995)

Answer 10

• high investments allow couples to get through tough times BUT also trap people in relationships
• women with high investments & poor alternatives return to abusive partners

Question 11

Commitment

Answer 11

Helps maintain relationships:
- alternatives are less attractive (Lydon & Karremans, 2015)
- accommodation occurs - when a fight happens, they attempt to fix the problem (Rusbult et al., 1991)
- they make more sacrifices (Righetti & Impett, 2017)

Question 12

Attachment theory (John Bowlby, 1969)

Answer 12

Infants form attachments that make them desire closeness to their caregiver (evolutionary advantage)

Question 13

There are different attachment orientations (Fraley et al., 2011)

Answer 13

• two axis: anxiety and avoidance (of intimacy)

Question 14

Attachment style:
Low avoidance and low anxiety:

Answer 14

Secure attachment

Question 15

Attachment style:
High avoidance and high anxiety:

Answer 15

Fearful-avoidant
- Highly stressed & isolates to cope

Question 16

Attachment style:
Low avoidance and high anxiety:

Answer 16

Anxious-preoccupied
- When stressed, over-relies on others

Question 17

Attachment style:
High avoidance and low anxiety:

Answer 17

Dismissive-avoidant
- Avoids intimacy, expects relationships to fail
- Relief after break-up

Question 18

Consistency of attachment styles

Answer 18

Bowlby claimed attachment style originates early in life and shapes relationships from the “cradle to grave”

Question 19

Changing attachment styles

Answer 19

Attachment is stable over time (e.g., Hadiwijaya et al., 2020; Waldinger & Schultz, 2016) but can change due to:
- break-ups & new (good) relationships (Fraley, 2019)
- age - as we age we become more secure (Chopik et al., 2019)