1. core operating beliefs

Question 1

Flashcard #001

Front:
I don’t owe anyone emotional access.

Answer 1

Back:
This stops guilt and people-pleasing in their tracks.
It reminds you: Access is a privilege, not a right.

> Example:
Someone asks, “Why didn’t you open up to me?”
You respond: “Was I supposed to?”

Question 2

Flashcard #002

Front:
Every question is a power move—I decide how the game goes.

Answer 2

Back:
Questions aren’t neutral. They set frames.
If you answer without thinking, you enter their world.

> Example:
“Are you mad at me?” becomes:
“Why do you ask?”

Question 3

Flashcard #003

Front:
Stillness is dominance. Silence is strategy.

Answer 3

Back:
You don’t need to respond fast—or at all.
Quiet unnerves the untrained.

> Example:
A long pause after a loaded question = control.
They’ll start talking to fill it—and expose themselves.

Question 4

Flashcard #004

Front:
I control the tone by controlling the frame.

Answer 4

Back:
If you accept their frame, you play their game.
If you shift the frame, you set the emotional tone.

> Example:
“You’ve been so distant.”
You reply: “Do you think closeness is always healthy?”

Question 5

Flashcard #005

Front:
Curiosity shields me. Certainty traps me.

Answer 5

Back:
When you answer with curiosity, you stay untouchable.
Certainty gets dissected—questions don’t.

> Example:
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
You say: “Would it have mattered if I did?”

Question 6

Flashcard #006

Front:
If it’s not a question I’d ask, it’s not one I need to answer.

Answer 6

Back:
Just because they ask doesn’t mean it’s valid.
Let your values filter the questions—not your guilt.

> Example:
“Don’t you trust me?”
You return: “Is there something I should know?”