Week 9 Flashcards
(37 cards)
What is the best way to measure a relationship?
- Do not measure your relationship against NO conflict but rather how you resolve it
- Conflict is a point of disconnection that if handled properly can lead to mutual understanding, connection, and deeper intimacy
What are the sources of interpersonal conflict?
- Avoiding conflict altogether (avoidance)
- Rigidity (my way or the highway)
- Not listening
- Mind-reading
- The need to win: use of power and conotrol tactics (blaming/accusing: iron fist; playing the martyr: velvet rope)
- Negative reciprocity (respond to a negative comment with a negative comment)
- Demand-withdraw pattern (stonewalling): feel insulted and ignore the person
What is the demand-withdrawn pattern?
- Criticism
- Defensiveness
- Contempt
- Stonewall
What is the triangulation for maladaptive communication ?
- Victim
- Persecutor
- Rescuer
* Blaming; not taking responsibility
* Bring 3rd person into arguement: Rescuer
* roles will shift
What are attributions?
Cognitions people use to explain why a person behaves in a certain way
What are blaming attributions?
- Internal stable: inherent trait of individual (e.g., he’s a jerk; personality)
- External unstable: situation specific (e.g., he just had a huge fight with his boss; contexualizing behaviours)
What is involved in adaptive communication?
- Similairites - finding common ground
- Empathy - putting yourself in the other person’s skin and experiencing the world through their eyes
- Positive reciprocity - expressing how much you like each other’s qualitites
- Active listening
- Assertive communication
What are the 3 components to proper conflict resolution ?
- Active listening/reflective listening: Providing feedback of understanding. Paraphrase words and feelings. Clarifying what the person has said.
- Indentifying your position (DESC): Assertively state your thoughts and feelings by describing, expressing, specifying, and stating consequences
- Exploring alternative solutions: Find a common ground; negotiate (take turns, do both, trial period, split the difference)
How do you use DESC in regards to verbal assertiveness?
- Describe: Describe the behaviour/situation as completely and objectively as possible. Just the facts! Don’t attack.
- Express: Express your feelings or thoughts about the behaviour/situation. Try phrasing your statements using “I” and not you “You”.
- Specify: Specify what behaviour/outcome you would prefer to happen
- Consequences: Specify the consequences if this happens (Both + & -). This is not an ultimatum - refer back to your needs.
What occurs when you are assertive ?
When you are assertive you are able to:
* Decrease defensiveness
* Express and communicate your feelings accurately
* Ask for things you want and ‘say no’ to things you don’t want
* Have the opportunity to have your interests (needs, wants, concerns, fears) met
* Attain the respect of others
Whole clear message using minimally effective response
What is assertive behaviour?
Satisfying own needs, but not at the expense of others
What is non-assertive behaviour?
Giving up wishes and needs in order to satisy others
What is aggresive behaviour?
Seeking to domiinate others and meet needs at the expense of others
What is involved in nonverbal assertiveness?
- Stand straight
- Maintain eye contact
- Speak in clear and steady voice
- Speak fluently with no hesitation
- Keep your body language open and receptive (clear and confident)
What is involved in responsibility
conflict resolution
- Taking responsibility: no blaming!
- Setting physical and psychological boundaries
- non-assertive behaviour is toxic to the individual
What is social support?
Social interactions embedded in relationships that provide a person with potential access to actual or perceived resources from others who are perceived as “caring”
What is social strain?
social interactions within a network that are a source of stress because they drain resources or provide assistance in an unhelpful manner
How does social support help manage stress?
- Direct Effect Theory
- Stress Buffer Theory
What is the direct effect theory?
- prevention of stress from occuring
- beneficial effects regardless of stress level
- High stess + High social support = Benefit
- Low stress + High social support = Benefit
What is the stress buffer theory?
- prevent effects of stressor on health outcomes
- moderator
- High Stress + High social support (moderate/buffer high stress)= Benefit
- Low stress + High social support (to maange stress; nothing to buffer) = No benefit
- most frequent; presence of stress has to be here
What are the types of support?
- Tangible (e.g., money)
- Emotional (e.g., caring concern)
- Informational (e.g., resources, advice)
Importance of Matching hypothesis: social suport only effective when receiving the type of support you need
What is social support associated with?
- Overall rreported health
- Decreased depression
- Immune system (e.g. IL-6) - improve; lower inflammation
- Cardiovascular health
- Neuroendocrine function (e.g. cortisol)
- Patient adherence to medication
- Sex based differences: females give and receive greater social support than do males
What did Kirchsbaum et al 1995 find?
Social support and Health
- “Support” person present during anticipation phase
- Women had a heightened cortisol response to the TSST when they were with their partner
- Men had a buffer when having no support than having a stranger with them ‘
- Men had lower levels of cortisol when with their partner
- Findings were independent of perceived stress, social support, and mood
What did Holt-Lundstad & Clark 2014 find?
Social suport and Health
- Participants were assigned to either supportive friend or ambivalent friend
- Speech task; +/-/ambivalent/ambiguous messaging during task
- Outcome: cardiovascular response
Results
* Baseline BP w/ ambivalent friend > supportive friend (and greater feelings of anxiety)
* Reactivity HR with ambivalent friend > supportive freind (hyper)
* Reactivity BP and messaging: ambivalent > ambiguous (more stress reactive)
* Speed of BP Recovery with supportive friend > ambivalent friend