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1

“If you want to gather honey, don’t kick over the beehive”

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

2

Ninety-nine times out of a hundred, people don’t criticize themselves for anything, no matter how wrong it may be.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

3

Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself. Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person’s precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

4

B. F. Skinner, the world-famous psychologist, proved through his experiments that an animal rewarded for good behavior will learn much more rapidly and retain what it learns far more effectively than an animal punished for bad behavior. Later studies have shown that the same applies to humans. By criticizing, we do not make lasting changes and often incur resentment.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

5

Human nature in action, wrongdoers, blaming everybody but themselves.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

6

Criticisms are like homing pigeons. They always return home. Let’s realize that the person we are going to correct and condemn will probably justify himself or herself, and condemn us in return;.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

7

Book entitled Lincoln the Unknown.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

8

In the autumn of 1842 he ridiculed a vain, pugnacious politician by the name of James Shields.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

9

That was the most lurid personal incident in Lincoln’s life. It taught him an invaluable lesson in the art of dealing with people. Never again did he write an insulting letter. Never again did he ridicule anyone. And from that time on, he almost never criticized anybody for anything.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

10

Lincoln replied: “Don’t criticize them; they are just what we would be under similar circumstances. ”.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

11

“Don’t complain about the snow on your neighbor’s roof,” said Confucius, “when your own doorstep is unclean. ”.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

12

When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

13

“I will speak ill of no man,” he said, “and speak all the good I know of everybody. ” Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain—and most fools do.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

14

It takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving. “A great man shows his greatness,” said Carlyle “by the way he treats little men. ”.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

15

Instead of condemning people, let’s try to understand them. Let’s try to figure out why they do what they do. That’s a lot more profitable and intriguing than criticism; and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and kindness. “To know all is to forgive all. ”.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

16

Dr. Johnson said: “God himself, sir, does not propose to judge man until the end of his days. ” Why should you and I?.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

17

PRINCIPLE-1 Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

18

By making the other person want to do it. Remember, there is no other way.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

19

The only way I can get you to do anything is by giving you what you want.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

20

Dr. Dewey said that the deepest urge in human nature is “the desire to be important. ”.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

21

William James said: “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated. ”.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

22

The rare individual who honestly satisfies this heart hunger will hold people in the palm of his or her hand.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

23

If you tell me how you get your feeling of importance, I’ll tell you what you are. That determines your character. That is the most significant thing about you.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

24

Many people who go insane find in insanity a feeling of importance that they were unable to achieve in the world of reality.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

25

If some people are so hungry for a feeling of importance that they actually go insane to get it, imagine what miracle you and I can achieve by giving people honest appreciation this side of insanity.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

26

“I consider my ability to arouse enthusiasm among my people,” said Schwab, “the greatest asset I possess, and the way to develop the best that is in a person is by appreciation and encouragement. “There is nothing else that so kills the ambitions of a person as criticisms from superiors. I never criticize anyone. I believe in giving a person incentive to work. So I am anxious to praise but loath to find fault. If I like anything, I am hearty in my approbation and lavish in my praise. ”.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

27

What do you think was discovered to be the main reason wives ran away? It was “lack of appreciation. ”.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

28

We often take our spouses so much for granted that we never let them know we appreciate them.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

29

We nourish the bodies of our children and friends and employees, but how seldom do we nourish their self-esteem?.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

30

In the long run, flattery will do you more harm than good. Flattery is counterfeit, and like counterfeit money, it will eventually get you into trouble if you pass it to someone else. The difference between appreciation and flattery? That is simple. One is sincere and the other insincere.

How to win friends & influence people by Dale Carnegie

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