Experience of evaluating another individual positively.
Bases of Attraction
The aspects of a person that tend to make him or her appealing to others.
The relatively stable and distinctive qualities that characterize an individual, that have some coherence or internal organization to them, and that influence how the person behaves in and adapts to the world.
We are attracted to those with ___ personality traits, and dislike people with ___ ones.
List some of the most attractive traits.
Sincere, honest, understanding, loyal, truthful, trustworthy, intelligent, dependable, open-minded, thoughtful.
List some of the least attractive traits.
Liar, phony, mean, cruel, dishonest, untruthful, obnoxious, dishonourable, malicious, deceitful.
Tendency of a few endearing laws to make an otherwise wonderful person even more attractive.
Is the perfect person who does everything right rated as the most attractive?
No. The person that has many positive traits, but are tempered by a few endearing flaws are rated the most attractive.
Why does the pratfall effect work?
We are better able to relate to someone who does a good job but messes up once in a while than someone whose performance is invariably excellent.
Phantom Other Technique
A research procedure in which participants are asked to make judgements about a person believed to be real but is in fact a fiction constructed by the researchers.
What were the findings using the phantom other technique?
Those who were more similar were more attracted to each other.
The effects of similarity in relationships are clearest when considering similarities in…
Attitudes, values, and background.
Why is a similarity in personality not a good indicator of relationship satisfaction?
Some personality traits are distinctly unattractive.
The idea that people are attracted ti this who possess traits that they themselves lack.
Is the theory of complementarity proven?
No, it is not. There is no evidence that suggests that introverts are attracted to extroverts, etc.
Where does the common belief that opposites attract originate from?
The idea that even if two people are similar, they can still appear to be complementary by adjusting to situations.
Why are similarity in values and interests so attractive?
- Similar people are validating.
- People who are similar to us are easy to get along with.
- We expect that the person is going to like us.
In general, similarity leads to greater attraction. When is there an exception?
When the other person is in suffering or pain. We do not like to be reminded of our own vulnerability, therefore, we want to be as dissimilar to the person as possible.
Mere Exposure Effect
The idea that simply being exposed to something can make that thing intrinsically reinforcing.
When presented with a picture of herself, and a mirror image of that picture, which did the woman prefer, and which did everyone else prefer? What does this demonstrate?
The woman preferred the mirror image, while everyone else preferred the normal picture. This demonstrates the mere exposure effect.
What does the mere exposure effect assume?
That the exposure was not negative each time.
How does reciprocity play into attraction?
We are more attracted to people that are attracted to us.
In the study by Aronson and Linder, it was found that which behaviour exhibited by the confederate was deemed most attractive? Why is this surprising?
When the initial feedback was negative, but improved over time. Because it shows that attraction does not increase the longer you display positive behaviour towards someone.
Why is it the case that someone who displays positive behaviours the longest may not be the most attractive?
Because it shows the signs of a person that is easy to please. Kind words may be flattering, but hard to be taken personally.
The experience of finding someone desirable as a potential intimate partner. Also called sexual attraction.
The experience of finding someone desirable as a potential intimate partner. Also called romantic attraction.
What do college students most look for in a potential intimate partner?
Why would physical attraction be so important in looking for an intimate partner?
It is something you can know right away. You cannot immediately know honesty or intelligence, but you can know looks.
What factors were important in predicting whether students wanted a second date or not in Walster et al.’s study?
Physical attraction only.
___say they value physical attractiveness much more than ___ do.
Is it actually the case that men value physical attractiveness more than women?
It may not be the case. Women may think that physical attractiveness does not play as much of a role, but it was found in a study that it does.
Research confirms that people who are dating or about to get married tend to be rated as ___ to each other in physical appearance.
The tendency for partners in intimate relationships to be similar in physical attractiveness.
What effect did being aware of the possibility of rejection have on a study participant’s choices?
Did a study participant’s own attractiveness play into who they wanted to date?
No. Even the least attractive participants wanted to date the most attractive person.
What was the difference between attractive and unattractive individuals when selecting dates based on physical attractiveness?
Unattractive individuals were more likely to expect to be rejected.
Does one’s own physical appearance affect the sort of people one is willing to pursue? In what way?
Yes. People are reluctant to date anyone rated lower in physical attractiveness. However, people are also reluctant to approach those out of one’s league.
Does one’s own attractiveness rating affect the attractiveness rating of others?
Physical attraction is a powerful factor in intimate relationships. However, what works against it?
Desire to avoid rejection and desire to pursue relationships likely to be successful.
When someone is more attractive, people assume…
They are more interesting, more kind, more sensitive, and more likely to be successful.
The expectation that more attractive people will be more sociable leads to…
The reality that more attractive people are more sociable.
Physical appearance can/can’t have an effect on social interactions.
What are some positive consequences of being attractive?
- More dates.
- People smile at you more.
- Better chance of getting job.
- Higher salary in first job.
- Less likely to be convicted of crimes.
- When convicted, get shorter sentences.
What are some negative consequences of being attractive?
- Judged to be more vain and promiscuous.
- People lie about themselves to you more.
- Have a hard time trusting positive feedback from others.
Attractive people, on average, live ___ lives than unattractive people.
Are more physically attractive people healthier?
In short term relationships, both men and women valued ___ ___ very highly.
In long term relationships, what are some things that men and women valued as highly as physical attractiveness?
Personality traits, such as a good sense of humour.
The idea that humans have developed the capacity to pursue long-term relationships or short-term involvements as their circumstances warrant.
What explains why men and women have different preferences for short and long term preferences?
Sexual Strategies Theory
An evolutionary perspective on attraction and mate selection that tries to explain the qualities men and women look for when they pursue long-term versus short-term relationships.
When college students were asked the number of sexual partners they hoped to have over the next couple of years, men said 8 and women said 1. What does this suggest under the sexual strategies theory?
Men devote a disproportionate amount of effort into short-term relationships.
What is a trait that men rate highly in a short-term relationship but not in a long-term relationship?
While men ___ their standards for a short-term relationship, many women ___ their standards.
In a long-term relationship, women indicate a willingness to…
Settle for a less physically attractive partner if he will be a good provider in the future.
Standards for long-term relationships between men and women are…
Why was it the case that the men on the high bridge were more likely to make up romantic stories, or to call the women?
Because our bodies are not good at recognizing excitement or arousal. Men on the high bridge likely attributed their high state of arousal not to fear, but to the attractiveness of the researcher.
Misattribution of Arousal
The tendency to mistakenly believe that physical arousal stemming from one cause is actually the result of another cause; a source of situational effects on romantic and sexual attraction.
Men lower their standards in bars and at parties, but heighten them in libraries and at church. Is this the same for women?
No, it is the opposite for women.
Romantic attraction that is not reciprocated by the object of the attraction.
Why is unrequited love desirable for the lover?
- Tended to believe the object was exceptionally desirable.
- Believed the feelings would be returned eventually.
- Endorsed the view that simply being in love was rewarding, even it it was not returned.
With regards to the Aronson and Linder study, how can unrequited love be explained?
You do not know the end outcome (whether the person’s reactions will always stay negative, or whether they will turn positive).
Unwanted and disturbing attention from someone seeking a romantic relationship.
Why are stalkers dangerous?
Their insistence that they can win over the object of their affections despite increasing evidence and clear messages that their attentions are unwarranted.
Why is being the object of unrequited love unrewarding?
Because the cost of having to reject someone outweighs the benefits of having their romantic attention.
Playing hard to get was only attractive when…
The game could be won.
The process through which a committed relationship is formed.
An arranged social event where unacquainted people talk briefly with every potential romantic partner each person identifies with others he or she wishes to see again; if that wish is reciprocated, a date can be scheduled.
Why was claimed to be the case that in speed dating, men did not want to go out with the most physically attractive, or women did not want to go out with the man with the highest earning potential, as indicated earlier on?
Because a distinction can be drawn between going on a few dates and finding a marriage partner.
Our preferences have ___ bearing on who we ultimately end up with as mates.
Mate selection is a ___ process.
Why can’t individual traits predict mating behaviour?
Because a relationship requires partners to select each other, and for example, the way a partner feels during an interaction cannot be measured.
Nearness or physical closeness, a factor that can promote interpersonal contact and relationship formation.
___ is a prerequisite for the formation of any relationship.
The ___ has changed the meaning of proximity.
What is the difference between feeling attraction and starting a relationship?
Someone making the first move.
How does mate selection progress?
- Behaviours that alert potential mates to one’s presence.
- Behaviours that establish one’s sex.
- Behaviours that advertise one’s availability and interest in a relationship.
Receptiveness or a nonverbal signal shown by one person to another indicating it would be acceptable to initiate a conversation.
What are some weak signs of interest?
- Leaning forward.
- Speaking with animation.
- Not looking at members of the opposite sex walking by.
What are some strong signs of interest?
- Standing less than 18 inches away.
- Touching while laughing.
- Touching while not laughing.
The tendency for partners who are mutually involved and attracted to mimic each other’s movements unconsciously.
How is lack of interest conveyed?
- Lack of eye contact.
- Leaning away.
- Crossing one’s arms.
In contrast to direct, explicit expressions of interests, nonverbal behaviours…
Allow behaviour to be denied if not returned.
When they could plausibly claim to have a nonromantic reason for seeing a movie, ___ times as many men would sit next to attractive women.
Nonverbal communication’s downfall is how it can lead to ___.
___ were more likely to believe their partner is interested in them.
Two people getting together for a physical encounter and don’t necessarily expect anything further.
Over the last century, there has been a trend towards ___ ___.
Social Penetration Theory
A framework outlining how the breadth and depth of personal disclosures exchanged by two people affect the development of the relationship between them.
What are the two dimensions of self-disclosures?
Breadth and depth.
What is breadth in self-disclosures?
The variety of information shared.
What is depth in self-disclosures?
The personal significance of information shared.
Do we like people that disclose a lot about themselves to us, or do we like people that we disclose a lot about ourselves to?
Responding to someone’s personal disclosure by immediately revealing something equally personal.
Disclosure and attraction is closely related. However…
Not all personal disclosures bring people together.
When do personal disclosures drive people apart?
- When they violate the prescribed level of disclosure (the norm).
- When highly personal information is disclosed too early.
- When they give the impression that they will self-disclose to anyone that will listen.
Does self-disclosure alone make a difference in the development of a relationship?
No, it is the association between two people’s self-disclosures, the tendency for two people to match and then escalate and then match again in what they reveal to each other, that propels a new relationship forward.
Any theory of relationship formation that describes relationships as developing through a specific sequence of steps.
What are the 5 steps of a relationship according to Knapp and Vangelisti?
What is integrating?
Meeting with each other’s parents, planning a future together.
What is bonding?
Plans for the future are formalized in some form of public ceremony or ritual.
What is the problem with stage theory?
All relationships do not progress that way in an orderly pattern.
Researchers often look to ___ ___ instead of stage theory.
Specific events or behaviours that increase or decrease the level of commitment between two people.
Turning points were consistent…
When characterizing the development of relationships.
Give examples of turning points.
- Saying “I love you.”
- Moving in together.
- Moving to the same city.
- Buying a house together.