Mercury determines to use his Sosia disguise to out-Sosia Sosia and drive him away from the house. He utterly outwits the bewildered slave and, with the help of a few well-timed punches, almost convinces him that he is someone else.
MER. “quid faciet ille seruus?
MER. “What will that slave do?
“intrābitne per iānuam in hās aedīs?
“Will he enter through the door into this house?
“dīcetne mulierī Amphitruōnis omnia dē illā uictōriā?
“Will he tell Amphitruo’s wife everything about that victory?
“ego ad illum citō adībō et ab hīs aedibus abigam.
“I myself will go up to him quickly and I will drive him away from this house.
“numquam illum hominem ad hās aedīs peruenīre hodiē sinam.
“Never today will I allow that person to reach this house.
“quandō mea fōrma illīus fōrmae similis esse uidētur, mōrēs similēs habēbō.
“Since my shape seems to be like the shape of that one, I will have a similar character [lit. customs].
“ego igitur scelestus et mendāx erō.
“I myself therefore will be wicked and deceitful.
“hanc iānuam igitur dēfendam et illum ab hīs aedibus citō abigam.”
“Therefore I will defend this door and I will quickly drive him away from this house.”
(Sōsia Mercurium cōnspicātur)
(Sosia catches sight of Mercury.)
SŌS. “iam ego domum intrābō et capita rērum mulierī Amphitruōnis nūntiābō...
SOS. “Now I myself will enter (our) home and I will announce the main topics [lit. the headings of things] to Amphitruo’s wife.
“sed quis est hic homo?
“But who is this person?
“quem uideō ante domum?
“Whom do I see before (our) home?
“Do I see a soldier?
“nam ille certē iānuam dēfendere uidētur, ut mīles.
“For that (person) certainly seems to be defending the door, like a soldier.
“obsecrō hercle, quam fortis est!
“I implore (you), by Hercules, how strong he is!
“I don’t like it ... [lit. it is not pleasing]
“certē hospitium meum pugneum erit.
“Certainly my welcome will be a fisty one.
“miser sum! iam ille mē opprimet et necābit.”
“I am wretched! Already he is crushing me and he will kill me.”
(Mercury limbers up with his fists, pretending not to see Sōsia) MER. “quam magnum est pondus huic pugnō, et quam magnum illī...”
MER. “How great is the weight of [lit. to] this fist, and how great (that) of that one...”
SŌS. “periī! quam īrātus est!
SOS. “I’m done for! How angry he is!
“pugnōs plānē ponderat, ut arbitror.”
“Clearly he is weighing fists, as I think.”
MER. “sī quis hūc ueniet, pugnōs edet.”
MER. “If anyone will come [lit. to this place], he will eat fists.”
SŌS. “sed iam plēnus cēnae sum!
SOS. “But I am already full of dinner!
mālō illum mē nōn uidēre…plānē īrāscitur.”
“I prefer that he not see me ... clearly he is growing angry.”
MER. “sī hic pugnus ōs tanget, exossātum erit...”
MER. “If this fist touches a face, it will be deboned...”
SŌS. “nōlō illum mē exossāre.
SOS. “I don’t want that (person) to debone me.
ō mē miserum! tantī erō quantī mūrēna!”
“O wretched me! I will be worth as much as an eel!”
MER. “nescioquis hīc loquitur.”
MER. “Someone or other is speaking here.”
SŌS. “saluus sum! mē nōn uidet!
SOS. “I’m safe! He doesn’t see me!
“nam nōmen mihi nōn nescioquis sed Sōsia est.”
“For my name is [lit. the name to me] is not ‘someone or other’ but ‘Sosia.’”
(Mercurius Sōsiam cōnspicātur)
(Mercury catches sight of Sosia.)
MER. “quō abīre uīs, miser?
MER. Where do you want to go [lit. to go away], wretched (one)?
“dīc mihi, quis es?
“Tell me, who are you?
“seruusne es, an liber?
“Are you a slave, or free?
SŌS. “seruus sum, et hanc domum dominī et mulieris iam per iānuam inīre uolō.”
SOS. “I am a slave, and I wish now to enter this home of my master and (his) wife through the door.”
MER. “cuius seruus es?
MER. “Whose slave are you?
“cūr in hās aedīs inīre cōnāris?
“Why are you trying to enter (into) this house?
“cūr tēcum loqueris?
“Why are you talking to yourself?
“What will you announce?
SŌS. “mēcum nōn loquor sed uictōriam mulierī dominī meī nūntiāre cōnor.
SOS. “I’m not talking to myself but I’m trying to announce a victory to the wife of my master.
“nam haec iubet dominus meus.
“For my master orders this [lit. these things].
“illīus enim seruus sum.”
“For I am his slave.”
MER. “You’re lying!
“abī, scelerum caput!
“Go away, head of (all) criminals!
“homo nihilī es!
“You are a person of no value!
“I am getting extremely angry!
“nisi statim abībis, ego tē, sceleste, exossābō!
“Unless you (will) go away, I will debone you, wicked one!
“tantī eris quantī mūrēna!”
“You will be worth as much as an eel!”
SŌS. “īrātus plānē est.
SOS. (aside) “Clearly he is angry.”
“sī in mē pugnōs exercēre uīs, cūr in parietem illōs haud prīmō domās?”
“If you want to exercise your fists on me, why don’t you first break them in [lit. tame them] on the wall.”
MER. “sī haud abībis statim...”
MER. “If you (will) go away at once ...”
SŌS. “abīre haud poterō.”
SOS. “I will not be able to go away.”
MER. “cūr abīre nōn poteris?”
MER. “Why will you not be able to go away?
SŌS. “abīre haud poterō quod hīc habitō, atque huius familiae seruus sum.”
SOS. “I will not be able to go away because I live here, and I am a slave of this household.”
MER. “quis est dominus tibi?”
MER. “Who is your master?”
SŌS. “Amphitruō et mulier illīus, Alcumēna.”
SOS. “Amphitruo and his wife, Alcumena.”
MER. “et quid est nōmen tibi, scelerum caput?”
MER. “And what is your name, head of all thieves?”
SŌS. (grandly) “Sōsiam mē uocant Thēbānī, Dāuī filium.”
SOS. “The Thebans call me Sosia, the son of Davus.”
MER. “quid tū loqueris?
MER. “What are you yourself saying?
“You lie, scoundrel.
“tū Sōsia es?
“YOU are Sosia?”
“ego sum Sōsia.”
“I myself am Sosia.”
(Mercurius Sōsiam uerberat)
(Mercury beats up Sosia.)
SŌS. “periī! mē necāre uult!”
SOS. “I am done for! He wants to kill me!”
MER. “etiam clāmās, homo nihilī?
MER. “Are you still shouting, worthless person?
“cui seruus nunc es?”
“Whose servant are you now? [lit. To whom are you now a servant?]
SŌS. “sum Amphitruōnis Sōsia et mulieris illīus.”
SOS. “I am (the slave) of Amphitruo and of his wife.
MER. “nescius etiam es.
MER. “You are still ignorant.
“Do not lie.”
“Sōsia ego sum, nōn tū.”
“I myself am Sosia, not you.”
(iterum illum uerberat Mercurius)
(Again Mercury beats up that one.)
SŌS. “periī, occidī.”
SOS. “I’m done for! I’m dead!” (lit. I have perished, I have died)
MER. “etiam clāmās, homo nihilī? tacē.”
MER. “Are you still shouting, worthless person? Shut up.”
SOS. “I will be silent.”
MER. “quis dominus tuus est?
MER. “Who is your master?
“cui nunc seruus es?”
“Whose slave are you now?”
SŌS. “nesciō. quem uīs?”
SOS. “I don’t know. Whom do you wish (me to be)?”
MER. “bene loqueris. quid igitur?
MER. “You speak well. What then?
“quid nunc tibi est nōmen?”
“What is your name now?”
SŌS. “nesciō. quid iam uīs?”
SOS. “I don’t know. What at this point do you want (it to be)?”
MER. “bene dīcis. nescius nōn es.
MER. You speak well.
“at respondē: esne Amphitruōnis Sōsia?
You are not ignorant.
“estne mulier illīus domina tua?”
“But answer: are you Amphitruo’s Sosia?
SŌS. “at nōlī, precor, mē Sōsiam uocāre.”
“Is that (man’s) wife your mistress?”
MER. “bene respondēs.
SOS. “But do not, please, call me Sosia.”
“nūllus enim est seruus Amphitruōnis nisi ego.”
MER. “You answer well.
SŌS. (clam loquitur)
“For no one is is Amphitruo’s slave unless I (am).”
“nūllus est homo tam scelestus quam hic.
SOS. (speaks secretly)
“quis est seruus Amphitruōnis Sōsia nisi ego?
“No one is a person so wicked as (is) this (one).
“egone iam stō domum ante nostram?
“Who is the slave of Amphitruo if it is not I?
“quis loquitur nisi ego?
“Do I myself now stand before our home?
“quis hīc habitat nisi ego?
“Who speaks if it is not I?
“nesciusne nōminis meī sum?
“Who lives here if it is not I?
“domum igitur inībō nostram.”
“Am I ignorant of my name?
(Sōsia domum inīre per iānuam cōnātur sed Mercurius prohibet)
“Therefore I will enter our home.”
MER. “quae uerba loqueris?
(Sosia tries to enter his home through the door, but Mercury prevents him.)
“tuamne dīcis hanc domum?
MER. “What words are you speaking?
“sed haec domus mea est, nōn tua, homo nihilī.
“Do you say this is YOUR house?
“But this is my house, not yours, worthless person.
(iterum uerberat Mercurius Sōsiam)
SŌS. “periī! nam ego nōn mentior.
(Again Mercury beats up Sosia.)
“quis ego sum, sī nōn Sōsia?
SOS. “I’m done for! For I am not lying.
“per Iouem iūrō, Sōsia sum ego!”
“Who am I, if not Sosia?
MER. “at ego per Mercurium iūrō, Iuppiter tibi non crēdit.
“I swear by Jupiter, I myself am Sosia!”
“ubi ego Sōsia nōlō esse, tū Sōsia eris.
MER. “When I myself don’t want to be Sosia, you yourself will be Sosia.
“nunc, quandō ego sum Sōsia, mālō tē Sōsiam nōn esse.
“Now, since I myself am Sosia, I prefer you not to be Sosia.
“abī, scelerum caput.”
“Leave, head of all criminals.”